1
00:02:03,367 --> 00:02:05,500
We need to call it, right?

2
00:02:07,634 --> 00:02:08,768
I think so too.

3
00:02:24,034 --> 00:02:25,701
- Hey. Hey, hey.
- What?

4
00:02:28,534 --> 00:02:29,367
Hey.

5
00:02:30,101 --> 00:02:31,565
They're sleeping.

6
00:02:31,567 --> 00:02:33,598
I know.
Do you think that...

7
00:02:33,600 --> 00:02:34,965
Should I pack a bag
and check into a hotel?

8
00:02:34,967 --> 00:02:36,398
No, no. That's dramatic. What?

9
00:02:36,400 --> 00:02:38,331
No, I know, just with the...

10
00:02:38,333 --> 00:02:39,632
- Or I could...
- What?

11
00:02:39,634 --> 00:02:41,032
I could make up a bed
down on the couch too,

12
00:02:41,034 --> 00:02:42,932
- if that's gonna be...
- No, no, no.

13
00:02:42,934 --> 00:02:43,965
- Really?
- That's not necessary.

14
00:02:43,967 --> 00:02:45,365
Let's just...

15
00:02:45,367 --> 00:02:46,932
- Okay, what...
- Oh...

16
00:02:46,934 --> 00:02:48,932
-Hey, buddy,
-TESS: Hey. Hey, buddy.

17
00:02:48,934 --> 00:02:51,067
- What are you doing up?
- Are you guys fighting?

18
00:02:51,534 --> 00:02:52,934
- No.
- No. No, no, no.

19
00:02:53,735 --> 00:02:55,532
No, actually, we're not...
we're not fighting at all.

20
00:02:55,534 --> 00:02:57,001
We never fight.

21
00:02:57,534 --> 00:02:58,598
That's true.

22
00:02:58,600 --> 00:03:00,433
Go back to bed, baby, okay?

23
00:03:00,867 --> 00:03:03,567
Come here, Charlie.
Come on. Outside.

24
00:03:07,635 --> 00:03:09,967
Come on, Charlie. Charlie, come.

25
00:03:10,567 --> 00:03:11,735
Come on, Charlie, let's go.

26
00:03:29,333 --> 00:03:30,768
- Our last hurrah.
- What?

27
00:03:32,433 --> 00:03:33,901
- You know, just with the...
- Yeah, yeah.

28
00:03:34,867 --> 00:03:36,532
The other day,
we were watching this, like,

29
00:03:36,534 --> 00:03:37,832
just one of those
doomsday docs, right?

30
00:03:37,834 --> 00:03:39,065
You know, meteors,
the Earth, wars,

31
00:03:39,067 --> 00:03:39,865
- everything, all that stuff.
- Uh-huh.

32
00:03:39,867 --> 00:03:41,065
And so, you know, he had

33
00:03:41,067 --> 00:03:42,565
the weirdest look on his face.

34
00:03:42,567 --> 00:03:43,800
And at the end of the doc,
I looked at him,

35
00:03:43,801 --> 00:03:45,498
and I said, you know,

36
00:03:45,500 --> 00:03:47,932
"How do you feel about that?
Does that bother you? Does it..."

37
00:03:47,934 --> 00:03:49,800
You know,
fully expecting him to be like,

38
00:03:49,801 --> 00:03:51,565
"Hey, what...
What do we do about this?"

39
00:03:51,567 --> 00:03:52,965
Nothing.

40
00:03:52,967 --> 00:03:55,032
He's perfectly fine
with the world coming to an end.

41
00:03:55,034 --> 00:03:56,832
He literally said,

42
00:03:56,834 --> 00:03:58,733
"Well, you know, I've had
a good life up until now.

43
00:03:58,735 --> 00:04:00,065
What's there to be sad about?"

44
00:04:00,067 --> 00:04:03,398
Jalen, my 17-year-old boy.

45
00:04:03,400 --> 00:04:04,666
First of all,
he's brilliant, right?

46
00:04:04,668 --> 00:04:06,999
He excels at everything
he puts his mind to.

47
00:04:07,001 --> 00:04:09,398
But I just thought,
"What kind of mindset is that?"

48
00:04:09,400 --> 00:04:12,899
My body does not say it,
but I still feel...

49
00:04:12,901 --> 00:04:15,766
like I'm 24 years old, at best.

50
00:04:15,768 --> 00:04:17,566
Thank you, babe.
Shut up, Stephen.

51
00:04:17,568 --> 00:04:18,699
But, you know,
seriously, though.

52
00:04:18,701 --> 00:04:20,398
I'm not ready
for shit to end, right?

53
00:04:20,400 --> 00:04:22,034
- Are you? No?
- No.

54
00:04:22,400 --> 00:04:25,032
Well, because he lives
in a world with the likelihood

55
00:04:25,034 --> 00:04:26,733
that we may blow ourselves up
at any moment.

56
00:04:26,735 --> 00:04:27,832
What?

57
00:04:27,834 --> 00:04:28,965
But that's nothing new.

58
00:04:28,967 --> 00:04:29,899
We all grew up
during the Cold War.

59
00:04:29,901 --> 00:04:31,398
Guys, it isn't that.

60
00:04:31,400 --> 00:04:32,431
Yeah, but remember,
we were scared.

61
00:04:32,433 --> 00:04:33,599
It's not that. He's alive.

62
00:04:33,601 --> 00:04:35,699
You know? He just goes.

63
00:04:35,701 --> 00:04:38,999
He goes for it every day.
He crushes it every day.

64
00:04:39,001 --> 00:04:39,865
- That's true.
- Mm. Yeah.

65
00:04:39,867 --> 00:04:41,832
And he's in joy because of it.

66
00:04:41,834 --> 00:04:43,331
How 'bout joy?

67
00:04:43,333 --> 00:04:45,533
I mean, it's beautiful.

68
00:04:45,535 --> 00:04:47,999
Not giving a fuck about trying
to be like other people

69
00:04:48,001 --> 00:04:49,668
or trying to be a grown-up.

70
00:04:49,867 --> 00:04:51,999
Uh! Fuck!

71
00:04:52,001 --> 00:04:53,331
Wait, are you talking about me?

72
00:04:53,333 --> 00:04:54,800
No, somebody alive!

73
00:04:54,801 --> 00:04:56,065
- Shit.
- Jesus.

74
00:04:56,067 --> 00:04:57,735
- I was joking!
- Also dead.

75
00:04:59,333 --> 00:05:01,400
Just joking.

76
00:05:01,801 --> 00:05:03,768
You are so alive, darling.

77
00:05:04,101 --> 00:05:05,065
- Hey, I found it!
- "Darling"?

78
00:05:05,067 --> 00:05:06,533
Yes.

79
00:05:06,535 --> 00:05:08,465
- Oh, shit!
- Oh, my God!

80
00:05:08,467 --> 00:05:09,932
- Oh, my gosh.
- Are you all right?

81
00:05:09,934 --> 00:05:10,932
You all right?

82
00:05:10,934 --> 00:05:13,032
Oh, my God.
Are you okay?

83
00:05:13,034 --> 00:05:15,699
- Oh, the rug. I'm sorry...
- Fuck. What the absolute fuck?

84
00:05:15,701 --> 00:05:16,932
- Balls!
- I'm sorry!

85
00:05:16,934 --> 00:05:18,766
I'll go. No, no, no, it's okay.

86
00:05:18,768 --> 00:05:20,733
- No, no! There's milk in it!
- I'll get more. I'll get more.

87
00:05:20,735 --> 00:05:22,431
- Balls. No.
- It's right around the corner.

88
00:05:22,433 --> 00:05:23,599
- She doesn't need it.
- Stay, it's fine.

89
00:05:23,601 --> 00:05:24,733
- It's like every week.
- I'm sorry. Sorry.

90
00:05:24,735 --> 00:05:26,065
God.

91
00:05:26,067 --> 00:05:27,398
Don't cry
over spilled oat milk, okay?

92
00:05:27,400 --> 00:05:28,865
Yeah, this is fine for you.

93
00:05:28,867 --> 00:05:30,666
- Jesus.
- Oh, my God.

94
00:05:30,668 --> 00:05:32,800
- It's literally everyday.
- Balls, it's perfect.

95
00:05:32,801 --> 00:05:34,499
- Thank you.
- You all right?

96
00:05:34,501 --> 00:05:37,766
Uh, yeah. I'm a little... I'm
just, like, a little nervous.

97
00:05:37,768 --> 00:05:38,967
- Yeah, you seem it.
- 'Cause, uh...

98
00:05:39,967 --> 00:05:41,668
one of the guys is, uh...

99
00:05:43,535 --> 00:05:44,766
not gonna be there
next Saturday matinee,

100
00:05:44,768 --> 00:05:46,601
so if you wanna come...

101
00:05:47,067 --> 00:05:49,733
Oh, wow. Shit.
Do you know all his lines?

102
00:05:49,735 --> 00:05:51,735
His lines? Yeah,
I know all the disciples' lines.

103
00:05:52,067 --> 00:05:53,965
- Of Christ?
- Yeah.

104
00:05:53,967 --> 00:05:56,099
I'm just so grateful
I can grow such a hefty beard.

105
00:05:56,101 --> 00:05:57,365
You know what I mean?
Do I look like a disciple?

106
00:05:57,367 --> 00:05:58,999
- Babe, what? What?
- Am I doing it wrong? I'm sorry.

107
00:05:59,001 --> 00:06:00,566
No? I'm sorry.

108
00:06:00,568 --> 00:06:02,398
- Oh, my God.
- This always happens.

109
00:06:02,400 --> 00:06:03,999
Half of me is always
living in the play.

110
00:06:04,001 --> 00:06:05,331
- Jesus.
- Yeah.

111
00:06:05,333 --> 00:06:06,499
It's the burden
of my beautiful wife.

112
00:06:06,501 --> 00:06:07,832
Oh, God.

113
00:06:07,834 --> 00:06:09,400
You got it, St. Paul.

114
00:06:09,601 --> 00:06:12,865
Mm. Living with an artist, guys.
Living with an artist.

115
00:06:12,867 --> 00:06:14,533
By the way, Oyster Bay?

116
00:06:14,535 --> 00:06:15,733
- Yeah?
- We call the primary.

117
00:06:15,735 --> 00:06:16,766
Wait, you can't call it
this far out.

118
00:06:16,768 --> 00:06:17,766
Yes, we just did actually.

119
00:06:17,768 --> 00:06:18,899
Why not?
Let them.

120
00:06:18,901 --> 00:06:20,365
What do you mean?
It's not forever.

121
00:06:20,367 --> 00:06:22,065
Let them. Babe,
they're literally newlyweds.

122
00:06:22,067 --> 00:06:24,032
Plus, y'all two always take
the love shack attic anyway.

123
00:06:24,034 --> 00:06:25,499
It's actually perfect.
I love it.

124
00:06:25,501 --> 00:06:26,865
- Hey, you wanna know why?
- Yeah.

125
00:06:26,867 --> 00:06:28,668
Because we made Jalen there.

126
00:06:28,901 --> 00:06:30,065
We're not making
any more babies.

127
00:06:30,067 --> 00:06:31,533
- Yeah.
- No.

128
00:06:31,535 --> 00:06:32,899
Well, you never know...
Oh no, that's true.

129
00:06:32,901 --> 00:06:33,899
You didn't even make
your first two that way, right?

130
00:06:33,901 --> 00:06:35,099
Okay, wow.

131
00:06:35,101 --> 00:06:36,766
- Dude.
- That's enough.

132
00:06:36,768 --> 00:06:37,899
- No, please. Babe, stop, stop.
- All right. It's okay.

133
00:06:37,901 --> 00:06:39,365
- No, but you have to have sex.
- Please stop talking.

134
00:06:39,367 --> 00:06:40,432
Okay. Sorry, sorry.

135
00:06:40,434 --> 00:06:41,733
We have sex, we just didn't...

136
00:06:41,735 --> 00:06:43,032
You know what, you guys,

137
00:06:43,034 --> 00:06:44,065
maybe we should just
kinda wrap this thing up?

138
00:06:44,067 --> 00:06:44,999
Wait, you did have sex
to make...?

139
00:06:45,001 --> 00:06:45,899
Yeah, yeah.
You know what? We gotta...

140
00:06:45,901 --> 00:06:47,199
That's too much gardening
for you, please.

141
00:06:47,201 --> 00:06:50,666
I thought that they put it... No,
I thought you created a zygote.

142
00:06:50,668 --> 00:06:52,499
- I'm so tired.
- Christine.

143
00:06:52,501 --> 00:06:54,999
- What?
- You baking your cookies?

144
00:06:55,001 --> 00:06:56,499
Oh, um...

145
00:06:56,501 --> 00:06:58,099
Why? Why?
Does it smell like cookies?

146
00:06:58,101 --> 00:06:59,065
Mm-hmm.

147
00:06:59,067 --> 00:07:00,365
Really?

148
00:07:00,367 --> 00:07:01,533
No, I just... I think my kitchen

149
00:07:01,535 --> 00:07:03,666
just always smells like that.
You know?

150
00:07:03,668 --> 00:07:05,934
And you know what? Also, I was
heating the food in the oven.

151
00:07:06,401 --> 00:07:07,834
Do you want dessert?

152
00:07:08,568 --> 00:07:10,701
- We called an Uber.
- We have fortune cookies.

153
00:07:11,001 --> 00:07:12,499
Do you remember Macaulay Culkin?

154
00:07:12,501 --> 00:07:14,733
When they came back,
he was changed forever.

155
00:07:14,735 --> 00:07:16,668
- And I believed it.
- Babe. Let's walk them out.

156
00:07:17,333 --> 00:07:18,733
You asked her
about it specifically?

157
00:07:18,735 --> 00:07:19,867
Yeah. She lied.

158
00:07:20,067 --> 00:07:21,333
Oh...

159
00:07:22,268 --> 00:07:24,501
She was hiding 'em
till after we'd all gone.

160
00:07:25,067 --> 00:07:27,834
When they get even
higher as fuck. Right?

161
00:07:30,967 --> 00:07:32,901
And Christine,
when she's not high?

162
00:07:33,967 --> 00:07:35,368
- So grumpy.
- Ugh.

163
00:07:39,067 --> 00:07:39,934
Good thing we didn't tell 'em.

164
00:07:42,101 --> 00:07:43,701
Would've been too much
for them to take.

165
00:07:59,701 --> 00:08:01,801
Maybe I laid it on
a little too thick.

166
00:08:02,001 --> 00:08:02,967
Too thick?

167
00:08:04,535 --> 00:08:05,735
What?

168
00:08:06,334 --> 00:08:08,865
Why, 'cause one time
you called me darling?

169
00:08:08,867 --> 00:08:09,834
That's like...

170
00:08:11,535 --> 00:08:13,099
I mean, if that's your idea

171
00:08:13,101 --> 00:08:15,432
of laying it on too thick,
I mean, that's...

172
00:08:15,434 --> 00:08:16,768
Okay, okay!

173
00:08:27,334 --> 00:08:28,334
You took one?

174
00:08:28,668 --> 00:08:29,901
Fuck yeah.

175
00:08:30,635 --> 00:08:34,867
When I went to the bathroom,
I was stealing it.

176
00:08:37,434 --> 00:08:38,635
It's gonna make you
really fucking high.

177
00:08:39,967 --> 00:08:41,568
That's the idea.

178
00:08:46,401 --> 00:08:47,468
Mm.

179
00:09:00,735 --> 00:09:01,934
Fuck it.

180
00:09:11,801 --> 00:09:13,034
You ate more than I did.

181
00:09:19,434 --> 00:09:21,599
Oh shit, that was
probably really stupid.

182
00:09:21,601 --> 00:09:23,701
I love it.

183
00:09:24,601 --> 00:09:25,901
Oh, my God.

184
00:09:36,067 --> 00:09:37,533
Wait. What are you doing?

185
00:09:37,535 --> 00:09:38,568
Oh, my God. What am I doing?

186
00:09:39,334 --> 00:09:40,967
Sorry. Shit.

187
00:09:43,535 --> 00:09:44,599
Oh!

188
00:09:44,601 --> 00:09:45,535
Shit.

189
00:09:45,967 --> 00:09:47,535
Hey. Hey!

190
00:09:49,067 --> 00:09:50,301
You okay?

191
00:09:50,768 --> 00:09:52,568
Are you gonna be okay?

192
00:09:54,401 --> 00:09:56,067
- I think so.
- Yeah?

193
00:09:57,434 --> 00:09:58,699
You're okay?

194
00:09:58,701 --> 00:10:00,568
Yeah. The cookie
hasn't hit me yet.

195
00:10:02,501 --> 00:10:04,099
I'm gonna be okay.

196
00:10:04,101 --> 00:10:05,034
I'll be okay.

197
00:10:19,768 --> 00:10:21,368
Holy shit.

198
00:11:10,568 --> 00:11:11,735
What's up?

199
00:11:12,401 --> 00:11:13,965
I just wanna come in
and get a drink.

200
00:11:13,967 --> 00:11:15,001
Yeah, 15 buck cover.

201
00:11:16,635 --> 00:11:18,401
- To get a drink?
- It's comedy.

202
00:11:20,934 --> 00:11:21,834
Is it funny?

203
00:11:23,601 --> 00:11:24,867
It's 15 bucks, man.

204
00:11:25,401 --> 00:11:26,800
Yeah, you already said that.

205
00:11:26,801 --> 00:11:28,832
Look, man, I don't have
any money on me.

206
00:11:28,834 --> 00:11:30,401
Yeah, I don't know
what to tell you.

207
00:11:31,334 --> 00:11:32,599
- Hey.
- Yo.

208
00:11:32,601 --> 00:11:33,635
- Good luck.
- Thank you.

209
00:11:35,034 --> 00:11:36,533
How come she didn't
have to pay 15 bucks?

210
00:11:36,535 --> 00:11:37,601
She put her name down.

211
00:11:41,934 --> 00:11:42,934
<i>Well, you're welcome.</i>

212
00:11:43,867 --> 00:11:46,368
All right. Alex Novak,
downstairs in two minutes.

213
00:11:48,001 --> 00:11:49,334
That's me.

214
00:11:49,801 --> 00:11:51,001
Well, you better
head down there, then.

215
00:11:51,735 --> 00:11:53,566
- Where?
- Just straight behind you.

216
00:11:53,568 --> 00:11:54,768
Down the stairs.

217
00:12:02,568 --> 00:12:04,399
Hey, hey. Hey.

218
00:12:04,401 --> 00:12:06,334
Why don't you leave that right
over there with the other ones?

219
00:12:06,867 --> 00:12:08,434
- Right here?
- Yeah. They'll watch it.

220
00:12:12,334 --> 00:12:13,401
Okay.

221
00:12:21,102 --> 00:12:22,100
Oh, my God.
It's completely different.

222
00:12:22,102 --> 00:12:24,399
Like, you cannot have
casual sex with a woman.

223
00:12:24,401 --> 00:12:25,699
Okay? You can't do it.

224
00:12:25,701 --> 00:12:29,066
You have to buy her dinner,
um, at least.

225
00:12:29,068 --> 00:12:30,834
With men, I am the dinner.

226
00:12:32,501 --> 00:12:35,599
It's easy. It's easy.
It's simple. It's simple.

227
00:12:35,601 --> 00:12:37,332
- Sorry.
- What up, man?

228
00:12:37,334 --> 00:12:38,901
- They called me.
- Yeah.

229
00:12:39,934 --> 00:12:41,801
When you see the light,
just get off, all right?

230
00:12:43,401 --> 00:12:45,499
There you go.
Just talk to 'em, have fun.

231
00:12:45,501 --> 00:12:46,965
Orgasm from
a man who embarrasses you.

232
00:12:46,967 --> 00:12:49,735
No, I'm leaving.
I'm leaving. I'm going.

233
00:12:52,568 --> 00:12:53,965
Okay.

234
00:12:53,967 --> 00:12:56,599
That's Rolo, everybody!
That was really funny.

235
00:12:56,601 --> 00:12:59,499
Alrighty, I got a lot
of familiar names on here,

236
00:12:59,501 --> 00:13:01,332
but I'm gonna shake it up a bit.

237
00:13:01,334 --> 00:13:04,865
Uh, let's put your hands
together for Alec Novak?

238
00:13:04,867 --> 00:13:06,102
Alec Novak.

239
00:13:08,535 --> 00:13:09,901
Alec Novak, everybody.

240
00:13:11,801 --> 00:13:12,601
Alec!

241
00:13:27,701 --> 00:13:28,934
Um...

242
00:13:33,801 --> 00:13:35,501
I don't have a ton of jokes.

243
00:13:38,035 --> 00:13:39,699
And, uh...

244
00:13:39,701 --> 00:13:42,967
Actually my name is
Alex Novak, uh, for that lady.

245
00:13:44,834 --> 00:13:46,601
It's okay.

246
00:13:47,701 --> 00:13:49,068
My parents won't be mad.

247
00:13:52,401 --> 00:13:53,601
Um...

248
00:13:55,468 --> 00:13:56,635
What do I tell ya?

249
00:13:57,834 --> 00:13:59,401
Um...

250
00:14:02,701 --> 00:14:04,468
I think I'm getting a divorce.

251
00:14:06,434 --> 00:14:07,535
Yeah.

252
00:14:10,901 --> 00:14:12,633
What tipped me off was that, uh,

253
00:14:12,635 --> 00:14:15,102
I'm living, um,
in an apartment on my own.

254
00:14:16,934 --> 00:14:18,499
Yeah.

255
00:14:18,501 --> 00:14:20,735
And my wife and kids
don't live there. So...

256
00:14:24,102 --> 00:14:25,801
That was probably the...
the biggest clue.

257
00:14:28,568 --> 00:14:29,568
Um...

258
00:14:37,901 --> 00:14:40,035
I was, uh... Well,
I was married for 20 years.

259
00:14:41,635 --> 00:14:43,468
Yeah.

260
00:14:44,068 --> 00:14:46,068
Uh, engaged...
Uh, engaged for two years.

261
00:14:47,368 --> 00:14:48,568
Dated for three.

262
00:14:51,635 --> 00:14:54,935
And... met a year before that.

263
00:14:57,434 --> 00:14:58,834
So, 26 years.

264
00:15:01,635 --> 00:15:02,701
Which makes sense...

265
00:15:04,334 --> 00:15:06,399
now, because my wife used to say
being married to me

266
00:15:06,401 --> 00:15:07,902
was like running a marathon.

267
00:15:11,735 --> 00:15:13,902
I don't really know
what happened, um...

268
00:15:16,635 --> 00:15:17,832
to my marriage.
Uh...

269
00:15:17,834 --> 00:15:22,501
I came home one day, um...
and my...

270
00:15:24,801 --> 00:15:26,568
I guess, still wife, but...

271
00:15:27,801 --> 00:15:29,568
Uh, Tess was her name.

272
00:15:31,434 --> 00:15:34,668
Her name is still Tess.

273
00:15:36,434 --> 00:15:38,801
I plan on, uh, letting her
keep that in the divorce.

274
00:15:43,568 --> 00:15:44,832
Um...

275
00:15:44,834 --> 00:15:47,635
Yeah, I... I came home,
and, um...

276
00:15:48,368 --> 00:15:51,035
there was a conversation,
I remember, and somebody said...

277
00:15:53,568 --> 00:15:57,568
It, um...
"Should we end this thing?"

278
00:15:58,068 --> 00:15:59,801
And then there was an agreement.

279
00:16:01,535 --> 00:16:03,535
Um, I'm pretty sure she said...

280
00:16:05,635 --> 00:16:07,701
This is what she meant
about not paying attention.

281
00:16:10,601 --> 00:16:12,801
Yeah, she... I came home.

282
00:16:14,434 --> 00:16:15,868
And, uh...

283
00:16:16,468 --> 00:16:19,368
I guess we both agreed
it was over.

284
00:16:19,735 --> 00:16:22,902
Which is awesome...
that at least we agreed on that.

285
00:16:26,102 --> 00:16:28,000
It was less awesome
for our two kids.

286
00:16:28,002 --> 00:16:30,466
Yeah.

287
00:16:30,468 --> 00:16:31,635
It's okay. They're ten.

288
00:16:34,102 --> 00:16:35,835
The... They're not...
They're not twins.

289
00:16:36,801 --> 00:16:38,002
They're Irish twins.

290
00:16:40,401 --> 00:16:41,501
Which is...

291
00:16:43,434 --> 00:16:45,401
why I pulled an Irish goodbye
when I left.

292
00:16:47,635 --> 00:16:48,935
Oh, come on.

293
00:16:49,501 --> 00:16:50,833
I thought you guys told...

294
00:16:50,835 --> 00:16:52,066
I thought this was a comedy...

295
00:16:52,068 --> 00:16:54,301
show.

296
00:16:56,902 --> 00:16:58,334
Anyway, um...

297
00:16:59,568 --> 00:17:02,002
I think I earned my keep here.
Um...

298
00:17:05,102 --> 00:17:06,968
What do I say? My name's Alex.

299
00:17:11,701 --> 00:17:13,366
Alex Novak, everybody.

300
00:17:13,368 --> 00:17:14,767
Sorry.
Is there a bathroom here?

301
00:17:14,769 --> 00:17:18,866
Wow. All right,
let's hear it for Jill McKenzie.

302
00:17:18,868 --> 00:17:21,968
There she is. There she is.

303
00:17:23,568 --> 00:17:25,733
Keep it going for Kemp,
you guys. Kemp rules.

304
00:17:25,735 --> 00:17:26,802
What's up?

305
00:17:27,735 --> 00:17:29,866
The side part
is the skinny part. Agreed?

306
00:17:29,868 --> 00:17:32,699
Now, the skinny part,
the side part... same part.

307
00:17:32,701 --> 00:17:35,000
Same size, same part.
You know what I'm talking about?

308
00:17:35,002 --> 00:17:36,733
You take it out and...

309
00:17:36,735 --> 00:17:39,002
<i>♪ Allez, allez, allez ♪</i>

310
00:17:39,668 --> 00:17:41,935
<i>♪ Allez, allez, allez ♪</i>

311
00:17:42,468 --> 00:17:44,368
You have to favor a labia?

312
00:17:44,835 --> 00:17:47,002
<i>♪ We've conquered
All of Europe ♪</i>

313
00:17:47,568 --> 00:17:49,468
<i>♪ We're never gonna stop ♪</i>

314
00:17:50,868 --> 00:17:52,769
<i>♪ Allez, allez, allez ♪</i>

315
00:17:54,068 --> 00:17:56,368
<i>♪ Allez, allez, allez ♪</i>

316
00:17:57,035 --> 00:17:58,566
because she wants me
to feel good.

317
00:17:58,568 --> 00:18:00,499
Like, for instance,
she's like a hot girl.

318
00:18:00,501 --> 00:18:01,800
You know what I mean?
Like, she has the vagina

319
00:18:01,802 --> 00:18:03,466
that fits the little underwear,
okay?

320
00:18:03,468 --> 00:18:04,800
She goes... And she...

321
00:18:04,802 --> 00:18:06,533
What was the advice she gave me?

322
00:18:06,535 --> 00:18:07,699
Oh, she said, "Boundaries?"

323
00:18:07,701 --> 00:18:08,833
You guys know
about these boundaries?

324
00:18:08,835 --> 00:18:10,432
You guys talk
about these boundaries?

325
00:18:10,434 --> 00:18:11,833
- She goes...
- First time?

326
00:18:11,835 --> 00:18:13,566
She goes, um, "You need to learn
how to set boundaries."

327
00:18:13,568 --> 00:18:14,933
Yeah.

328
00:18:14,935 --> 00:18:16,466
Stick around.
Support your fellow comics.

329
00:18:16,468 --> 00:18:18,000
"I told my boyfriend
he has to text me

330
00:18:18,002 --> 00:18:19,666
every night before bed,

331
00:18:19,668 --> 00:18:21,434
'Goodnight, I love you'
or it's over."

332
00:18:23,368 --> 00:18:25,833
And she goes, "Now, he texts me
every night before bed,

333
00:18:25,835 --> 00:18:28,000
'Goodnight, I love you.'
And now everything's great."

334
00:18:28,002 --> 00:18:30,432
And I was like, "Oh, thank...
thank you. Thanks."

335
00:18:30,434 --> 00:18:32,966
If I said that to any man I've
ever dated, they would be like,

336
00:18:32,968 --> 00:18:34,466
"Oh, perfect.
I was on the fence anyway.

337
00:18:34,468 --> 00:18:35,535
Get the fuck outta here, bitch."

338
00:18:36,968 --> 00:18:39,332
You know what, I'm not
fucking calling in favors.

339
00:18:39,334 --> 00:18:41,066
With me in a relationship,
it's me going, "No, dude."

340
00:18:41,068 --> 00:18:43,966
I... I gotta date better men.
I have to.

341
00:18:43,968 --> 00:18:45,900
My girlfriends are dating men
who are, like,

342
00:18:45,902 --> 00:18:48,499
running 10Ks
on the weekends for fun.

343
00:18:48,501 --> 00:18:50,966
My ex wouldn't let me touch his
<i>Magic: The Gathering</i> cards

344
00:18:50,968 --> 00:18:53,100
'cause he was worried
that I would bend them.

345
00:18:53,102 --> 00:18:55,568
They didn't say nothing
about my sister's new ass.

346
00:18:55,835 --> 00:18:57,066
Not even a warning.

347
00:18:57,068 --> 00:18:58,466
Just a warning
would have been nice.

348
00:18:58,468 --> 00:18:59,833
Something. Anything.

349
00:18:59,835 --> 00:19:01,900
"Hey Reggie, go in the kitchen.

350
00:19:01,902 --> 00:19:03,866
Meg Thee Stallion is in there."

351
00:19:03,868 --> 00:19:06,533
Now, I don't feel bad for
looking at my sister's new butt.

352
00:19:06,535 --> 00:19:08,599
On PS5. Kung fu game.

353
00:19:08,601 --> 00:19:09,601
Got it right now?

354
00:20:07,102 --> 00:20:08,767
So, what happens now?

355
00:20:08,769 --> 00:20:11,068
Between, you know, Mom and you?

356
00:20:11,636 --> 00:20:13,000
What do you mean?

357
00:20:13,002 --> 00:20:16,499
Well, you know, you guys
told us that you separated?

358
00:20:16,501 --> 00:20:17,866
Yeah.

359
00:20:17,868 --> 00:20:19,868
Does that mean you're
going to get divorced?

360
00:20:21,035 --> 00:20:22,734
Well, I...

361
00:20:22,736 --> 00:20:24,399
- Remember that dragon?
- What dragon?

362
00:20:24,401 --> 00:20:26,466
At the... at the assembly.

363
00:20:26,468 --> 00:20:28,600
The school assembly.
The big red dragon.

364
00:20:28,602 --> 00:20:30,501
You mean the lion?

365
00:20:30,802 --> 00:20:32,399
Was it a lion?
Looked like a dragon.

366
00:20:32,401 --> 00:20:33,667
It only had two people in it.

367
00:20:33,669 --> 00:20:35,332
Huh.

368
00:20:35,334 --> 00:20:37,066
What does a dragon
have to do with anything?

369
00:20:37,068 --> 00:20:38,767
- It was a lion.
- Whatever it was,

370
00:20:38,769 --> 00:20:40,466
- lion or dragon.
- Lion.

371
00:20:40,468 --> 00:20:42,567
It was big and it was brave,

372
00:20:42,569 --> 00:20:44,600
and that's what I need
you guys to be.

373
00:20:44,602 --> 00:20:46,100
That's not it at all.

374
00:20:46,102 --> 00:20:47,700
The lion chews up the lettuce,

375
00:20:47,702 --> 00:20:49,933
and that brings us wealth
and prosperity for the new year.

376
00:20:49,935 --> 00:20:52,535
Right. That's it.
That's exactly it. Right.

377
00:20:53,002 --> 00:20:54,734
Are you going
to feed the lion, Dad?

378
00:20:54,736 --> 00:20:56,334
Me? I don't know, I...

379
00:20:56,802 --> 00:20:58,600
Are you?

380
00:20:58,602 --> 00:21:01,000
I fed it because I have goals
this year I want to achieve.

381
00:21:01,002 --> 00:21:02,499
Do you have goals, Dad?

382
00:21:02,501 --> 00:21:03,800
No, of course I do. Of course...

383
00:21:03,802 --> 00:21:05,602
- Dad, you should have goals.
- We have goals.

384
00:21:07,835 --> 00:21:08,800
Good night, guys.

385
00:21:08,802 --> 00:21:09,734
- Settle in.
- Dad...

386
00:21:09,736 --> 00:21:10,767
Settle in. All right.

387
00:21:10,769 --> 00:21:12,499
- Love you.
- Love you, too.

388
00:21:12,501 --> 00:21:14,432
Get down there. Get down there.

389
00:21:14,434 --> 00:21:16,334
All right, you guys.
Good night, guys.

390
00:21:17,669 --> 00:21:19,368
- No talking, all right, guys?
- Okay.

391
00:21:27,769 --> 00:21:29,767
I haven't told your father.

392
00:21:29,769 --> 00:21:30,866
What?

393
00:21:30,868 --> 00:21:32,634
<i>Entre nous.</i>

394
00:21:32,636 --> 00:21:34,966
No, Mom, there is no <i>entre nous.</i>
We don't have any secrets.

395
00:21:34,968 --> 00:21:36,667
The boys know everything.
You don't have to whisper.

396
00:21:36,669 --> 00:21:37,966
Well, you don't have
to embarrass me.

397
00:21:37,968 --> 00:21:39,066
I just told you
your father doesn't know.

398
00:21:39,068 --> 00:21:40,800
- Okay...
- What doesn't Grandpa know?

399
00:21:40,802 --> 00:21:42,534
That Mom and I are splitting up.

400
00:21:42,536 --> 00:21:43,900
Oh.

401
00:21:43,902 --> 00:21:45,066
Think you should tell him, Dada.

402
00:21:45,068 --> 00:21:46,634
- Great.
- Yes, son, that's up to you.

403
00:21:46,636 --> 00:21:47,734
It's got nothing to do with me.

404
00:21:47,736 --> 00:21:48,900
Yeah, well tell that
to our marriage.

405
00:21:48,902 --> 00:21:50,567
Look how you're going on.

406
00:21:50,569 --> 00:21:53,767
And stop being jealous
of my friendship with Tess.

407
00:21:53,769 --> 00:21:56,366
I adore her. I love her so much.

408
00:21:56,368 --> 00:21:57,833
- Dad! Dad?
- Yeah. I know it. What?

409
00:21:57,835 --> 00:21:59,332
- And you know something?
- Dad!

410
00:21:59,334 --> 00:22:01,534
Look, you two have always
been very different.

411
00:22:01,536 --> 00:22:02,399
Yeah, and you and Dad are twins?

412
00:22:02,401 --> 00:22:03,700
Dad? Dad?

413
00:22:03,702 --> 00:22:05,399
Your father is an immigrant
to this country.

414
00:22:05,401 --> 00:22:07,332
- I know that.
- And I've always been a woman

415
00:22:07,334 --> 00:22:08,634
who wants the taste
of the exotic.

416
00:22:08,636 --> 00:22:10,432
- And that's what makes it work.
- Mom! Jesus, Mom.

417
00:22:10,434 --> 00:22:11,432
I'm just saying this
in front of the children...

418
00:22:11,434 --> 00:22:12,866
Can I have another apple juice?

419
00:22:12,868 --> 00:22:14,033
- I already said no.
- Because there's no secrets,

420
00:22:14,035 --> 00:22:17,066
- so... Just pick a lane, okay?
- I know.

421
00:22:17,068 --> 00:22:18,902
- Why not?
- For crying out loud.

422
00:22:19,669 --> 00:22:20,767
Felix, it's your turn.

423
00:22:20,769 --> 00:22:22,567
Mom, do you have any...

424
00:22:22,569 --> 00:22:24,000
Do you have any more
of those juice boxes?

425
00:22:24,002 --> 00:22:25,933
Your father drank them all.

426
00:22:25,935 --> 00:22:27,933
It's got little pretzels on it.

427
00:22:27,935 --> 00:22:29,933
They're all individual pretzels?

428
00:22:29,935 --> 00:22:31,634
They all started individual,

429
00:22:31,636 --> 00:22:33,900
and then I, uh, glued
most of them together.

430
00:22:33,902 --> 00:22:35,033
Oh, oh.

431
00:22:35,035 --> 00:22:36,734
There's one or two separate.

432
00:22:36,736 --> 00:22:38,399
And you have the mustard
and the ketchup there, too.

433
00:22:38,401 --> 00:22:39,467
Yeah, yeah, yeah.

434
00:22:39,469 --> 00:22:40,933
But the guy's got the day off.

435
00:22:40,935 --> 00:22:42,432
You know?

436
00:22:42,434 --> 00:22:43,767
He's got the day off
like the rest of the town.

437
00:22:43,769 --> 00:22:45,669
Everybody's taking today off.

438
00:22:46,569 --> 00:22:48,669
She thinks I don't know,
but I know.

439
00:22:49,334 --> 00:22:50,734
Here, put that there.

440
00:22:50,736 --> 00:22:51,569
And, uh...

441
00:22:53,102 --> 00:22:54,769
For me, it's no big deal.

442
00:22:55,702 --> 00:22:58,667
Well, it is kind
of a big deal, Dad.

443
00:22:58,669 --> 00:23:00,000
I think that we're
gonna get divorced.

444
00:23:00,002 --> 00:23:01,900
Ah, okay. Slow down.

445
00:23:01,902 --> 00:23:04,002
Slow down.

446
00:23:05,802 --> 00:23:07,702
Clean your plates everyone.

447
00:23:08,102 --> 00:23:09,736
Grandma, do you have any Jell-O?

448
00:23:10,035 --> 00:23:11,636
- In the fridge.
- Okay.

449
00:23:13,636 --> 00:23:15,866
That's not what's
going on. Nobody cheated.

450
00:23:15,868 --> 00:23:18,467
Yeah, well,
so what is the problem then?

451
00:23:18,469 --> 00:23:19,301
I don't know, it's...

452
00:23:21,435 --> 00:23:22,667
complicated.

453
00:23:22,669 --> 00:23:23,835
It's complicated.

454
00:23:25,769 --> 00:23:27,368
You don't have to tell me that.

455
00:25:27,035 --> 00:25:29,435
Is Dada going to be okay?

456
00:25:29,802 --> 00:25:32,367
Of course. What do you mean?

457
00:25:32,369 --> 00:25:35,567
I don't know,
he's just out there. On his own.

458
00:25:35,569 --> 00:25:36,833
But he's not alone.

459
00:25:36,835 --> 00:25:39,100
He loves when you boys
stay with him.

460
00:25:39,102 --> 00:25:42,000
- But he sleeps on the couch.
- Huh?

461
00:25:42,002 --> 00:25:43,667
We sleep in his bed.

462
00:25:43,669 --> 00:25:45,068
Yeah, it's awesome.

463
00:25:45,702 --> 00:25:46,736
Great.

464
00:26:06,536 --> 00:26:08,835
For fuck's sake.

465
00:26:13,902 --> 00:26:15,669
Hey there, I'm Alex Novak.

466
00:26:16,536 --> 00:26:17,736
How you doing tonight?

467
00:26:18,469 --> 00:26:20,833
Once again I didn't want
to pay the 15 bucks,

468
00:26:20,835 --> 00:26:22,868
so... here I am.

469
00:26:25,435 --> 00:26:26,933
No, I'm joking, and...

470
00:26:26,935 --> 00:26:28,935
No, no, no, I'm joking. I, uh...

471
00:26:29,935 --> 00:26:32,333
I didn't pay last time, but
I was willing to pay this time,

472
00:26:32,335 --> 00:26:33,135
but I wanted to, uh...

473
00:26:34,835 --> 00:26:37,467
I said, uh,
I wanted to have fun.

474
00:26:37,469 --> 00:26:38,667
Wanted to have fun here tonight.

475
00:26:38,669 --> 00:26:40,002
Anybody else wanna have fun?

476
00:26:40,702 --> 00:26:42,433
Yeah?

477
00:26:42,435 --> 00:26:44,866
You know, I recently got fired.

478
00:26:44,868 --> 00:26:47,636
It's the fucking fifth time
I've been fired.

479
00:26:48,968 --> 00:26:50,835
I've only had three jobs.

480
00:26:54,335 --> 00:26:56,935
That means I've gotten fired
from two jobs fucking twice.

481
00:26:58,902 --> 00:27:00,033
Funny how things change...

482
00:27:00,035 --> 00:27:01,333
Bathroom's straight down
and to the right.

483
00:27:01,335 --> 00:27:02,700
No, I think I'm next on the...

484
00:27:02,702 --> 00:27:03,634
How things
become cool and uncool.

485
00:27:03,636 --> 00:27:04,767
They called my name.

486
00:27:04,769 --> 00:27:06,966
I drive a Tesla.

487
00:27:06,968 --> 00:27:07,968
And, um...

488
00:27:09,669 --> 00:27:10,866
I just have one question.

489
00:27:10,868 --> 00:27:14,400
Can you stop keying
my fucking car?

490
00:27:14,402 --> 00:27:16,000
So, a couple months into it,

491
00:27:16,002 --> 00:27:19,700
they bring my folks in
for like a parent's day.

492
00:27:19,702 --> 00:27:22,400
They kind of catch them up
on our progress, you know?

493
00:27:22,402 --> 00:27:24,769
I'm... I'm a teenager
at this point and, uh...

494
00:27:25,469 --> 00:27:28,000
So they come in and,
and Pete says, you know,

495
00:27:28,002 --> 00:27:29,534
"Alex has been great.

496
00:27:29,536 --> 00:27:30,966
He's opened up,
and this is what's going on,

497
00:27:30,968 --> 00:27:32,600
and this is how
he feels about this

498
00:27:32,602 --> 00:27:35,100
and this dynamic
that's going on at home."

499
00:27:35,102 --> 00:27:37,035
My parents just kind of listen.

500
00:27:37,669 --> 00:27:40,333
We're driving home,
little while later.

501
00:27:40,335 --> 00:27:41,700
And I remember this so clearly.

502
00:27:41,702 --> 00:27:45,066
I was in the back seat
of my mom's station wagon.

503
00:27:45,068 --> 00:27:46,634
But my dad was driving.
Doesn't matter.

504
00:27:46,636 --> 00:27:48,467
If my Dad was in the car,
he was always driving,

505
00:27:48,469 --> 00:27:50,933
even though it was
my mom's station wagon.

506
00:27:50,935 --> 00:27:54,500
And I remember her being
in the passenger seat

507
00:27:54,502 --> 00:27:57,968
and spinning around,
and looking at me and saying,

508
00:27:58,968 --> 00:28:01,835
"How dare you tell this stranger
all our family secrets."

509
00:28:04,769 --> 00:28:07,734
And I was like,
"You made go talk to the guy.

510
00:28:07,736 --> 00:28:10,700
You literally paid the guy
to listen to the problem.

511
00:28:10,702 --> 00:28:13,367
You set this up.
You drove me there."

512
00:28:13,369 --> 00:28:14,567
That's insane.

513
00:28:14,569 --> 00:28:15,835
That would be like...

514
00:28:16,868 --> 00:28:18,333
That would be like...
That'd be like your partner

515
00:28:18,335 --> 00:28:20,369
driving you to an orgy...

516
00:28:21,868 --> 00:28:23,433
and then saying,

517
00:28:23,435 --> 00:28:25,602
"I can't believe
you fucked all those people."

518
00:28:27,536 --> 00:28:30,000
"That was the point
of being there in the...

519
00:28:30,002 --> 00:28:33,669
You knew where I was going.
I was naked in the car."

520
00:28:35,369 --> 00:28:37,000
Anyway, uh, this is, uh...

521
00:28:37,002 --> 00:28:38,400
Boy, this is starting
to actually get good

522
00:28:38,402 --> 00:28:39,700
and now my time is up.

523
00:28:39,702 --> 00:28:41,702
This is so awesome.
I will see you next time.

524
00:28:43,469 --> 00:28:45,333
Same place. I'm coming back.
We'll meet here, all right?

525
00:28:45,335 --> 00:28:46,833
We'll all meet here.
All right, I've been Alex Novak.

526
00:28:46,835 --> 00:28:48,333
Thank you so much.

527
00:28:48,335 --> 00:28:50,066
Sad guy, you hanging out?

528
00:28:50,068 --> 00:28:51,734
Everyone's hanging out
in the back booth to the right.

529
00:28:51,736 --> 00:28:52,700
We got
some actually funny people

530
00:28:52,702 --> 00:28:54,667
- coming to the stage next.
- Okay, thank you.

531
00:28:54,669 --> 00:28:55,900
Good.
It takes the pressure off.

532
00:28:55,902 --> 00:28:57,400
That's how I feel about my dog.

533
00:28:57,402 --> 00:28:58,534
Hey.

534
00:28:58,536 --> 00:28:59,800
- Cool to sit down here?
- Yeah.

535
00:28:59,802 --> 00:29:01,734
- Look who's back.
- Just talked to Rolo upstairs.

536
00:29:01,736 --> 00:29:03,500
Hey, I remember you
from my... Yeah.

537
00:29:03,502 --> 00:29:05,866
- What up? Dan. What up?
- Alex.

538
00:29:05,868 --> 00:29:08,333
How'd it go?
I'm surprised you back.

539
00:29:08,335 --> 00:29:09,333
- Really?
- Yeah.

540
00:29:09,335 --> 00:29:10,667
- That bad?
- Yeah, I mean...

541
00:29:10,669 --> 00:29:12,033
- It wasn't bad.
- It wasn't.

542
00:29:12,035 --> 00:29:13,600
- What do you even do?
- Just say it.

543
00:29:13,602 --> 00:29:14,966
- He's gonna ask for a job.
- Come on, what is it?

544
00:29:14,968 --> 00:29:16,567
I work in finance.

545
00:29:16,569 --> 00:29:17,800
If you wanna do it again,
I'll tell you the website.

546
00:29:17,802 --> 00:29:18,966
Just DM me.

547
00:29:18,968 --> 00:29:20,502
- All right.
- Yeah. Just...

548
00:29:20,935 --> 00:29:23,433
All the mics in the city,
badsaliva.com.

549
00:29:23,435 --> 00:29:25,069
And just, keep going up.

550
00:29:25,935 --> 00:29:28,036
Yeah, yeah, yeah. You gotta
go up five, six times a week.

551
00:29:29,702 --> 00:29:30,966
- Yeah.
- Five or six times?

552
00:29:30,968 --> 00:29:32,767
No, sometimes we go
five a night.

553
00:29:32,769 --> 00:29:34,067
On long nights, yeah.

554
00:29:34,069 --> 00:29:35,467
If you have like a bit
you wanna work out,

555
00:29:35,469 --> 00:29:37,000
you go five times
by the end of the night.

556
00:29:37,002 --> 00:29:39,067
You got a spot.
Five minutes around the corner.

557
00:29:39,069 --> 00:29:40,567
- I'm Alex.
- Lovely.

558
00:29:40,569 --> 00:29:41,966
That's the manager,
and this is the one...

559
00:29:41,968 --> 00:29:42,933
- Oh.
- So, yeah, I have...

560
00:29:42,935 --> 00:29:44,800
Don't make eye contact
with her. Jesus.

561
00:29:44,802 --> 00:29:46,367
- Yeah, look down.
- Shut up.

562
00:29:46,369 --> 00:29:47,667
- I have four rooms.
- Sorry.

563
00:29:47,669 --> 00:29:50,067
You can see downstairs
where you just were.

564
00:29:50,069 --> 00:29:50,935
Yeah.

565
00:29:51,536 --> 00:29:52,700
Stop showing off
in front of your friend

566
00:29:52,702 --> 00:29:53,966
with Laverne
and Shirley back there.

567
00:29:53,968 --> 00:29:55,600
Fuck you!

568
00:29:55,602 --> 00:29:57,467
- We got jobs.
- I'm Laverne. I'm Laverne.

569
00:29:57,469 --> 00:29:58,667
What's your name again?

570
00:29:58,669 --> 00:30:00,534
- Alex.
- Alex, come here.

571
00:30:00,536 --> 00:30:02,435
- Hey man, that's my white slave.
- Shut up.

572
00:30:03,569 --> 00:30:04,767
You can have him.
Take him.

573
00:30:04,769 --> 00:30:06,734
Come talk
to some real comedians.

574
00:30:06,736 --> 00:30:07,933
What's up, man?

575
00:30:07,935 --> 00:30:09,636
Yo, you hold my pocket
when we leave.

576
00:30:11,902 --> 00:30:14,634
You can't treat comedy
like prison, man, Dan.

577
00:30:14,636 --> 00:30:15,966
He's <i>Scared Straight</i> -ing him.

578
00:30:15,968 --> 00:30:18,367
- Dan, don't <i>Scared Straight</i> him.
- He's scared straight.

579
00:30:18,369 --> 00:30:19,833
He's scared white.

580
00:30:19,835 --> 00:30:21,600
You gonna be all right.
How often are you getting up?

581
00:30:21,602 --> 00:30:24,034
I don't know, man.
Tonight was my second time.

582
00:30:24,036 --> 00:30:25,567
I put it to you like,
my pop used to let me

583
00:30:25,569 --> 00:30:27,467
watch <i>Def Jam</i> when I was six,

584
00:30:27,469 --> 00:30:29,900
but he would act like he
was telling me not to watch it.

585
00:30:29,902 --> 00:30:32,600
"Hey, me and your stepmom
are watchin' the program.

586
00:30:32,602 --> 00:30:35,034
It's on HBO. Go upstairs
and watch something else."

587
00:30:35,036 --> 00:30:36,800
And then wink at me.
And I'll be like, "Oh, shit."

588
00:30:36,802 --> 00:30:38,933
I actually got caught by my dad.

589
00:30:38,935 --> 00:30:40,667
I was trying to watch porn.

590
00:30:40,669 --> 00:30:42,333
You know, like, the,
the late night HBO,

591
00:30:42,335 --> 00:30:43,900
the <i>Taxicab Confessions</i>
or whatever.

592
00:30:43,902 --> 00:30:45,833
- Oh, yeah. <i>Real Sex.</i>
- I was trying to watch porn,

593
00:30:45,835 --> 00:30:49,067
and it was <i>Def Comedy Jam,</i>
and I saw Greer Barnes on stage

594
00:30:49,069 --> 00:30:51,634
doing a joke about Mike Tyson
and Arnold Schwarzenegger

595
00:30:51,636 --> 00:30:52,900
sharing a jail cell together.

596
00:30:52,902 --> 00:30:54,600
I was dying laughing,

597
00:30:54,602 --> 00:30:56,534
and I asked my dad,
I was like, "Is that a job?"

598
00:30:56,536 --> 00:30:58,933
And he was like, "Yeah.
You gotta go to college first."

599
00:30:58,935 --> 00:31:00,900
- Been doing jokes ever since.
- Gotta get up everyday.

600
00:31:00,902 --> 00:31:03,400
Open that diary,
Anne Frank. Get to it.

601
00:31:03,402 --> 00:31:04,700
What? What's wrong?

602
00:31:04,702 --> 00:31:06,333
You guys just
write stuff down all day?

603
00:31:06,335 --> 00:31:07,900
I said to open up his diary
if he gonna write any jokes.

604
00:31:07,902 --> 00:31:09,467
- You gotta write.
- Work on your craft.

605
00:31:09,469 --> 00:31:11,602
You gotta write.

606
00:31:27,003 --> 00:31:30,335
Just... I was just watching CNN,
and they say it's official,

607
00:31:31,669 --> 00:31:33,469
according to scientists...

608
00:31:33,902 --> 00:31:36,567
No. According to scientists,
it's official,

609
00:31:36,569 --> 00:31:37,969
guys get hotter with age.

610
00:31:39,335 --> 00:31:40,866
Big win.

611
00:31:40,868 --> 00:31:43,333
Then we convinced them,
you know what's really hot?

612
00:31:43,335 --> 00:31:44,069
Dad bods.

613
00:31:45,036 --> 00:31:46,467
You kiddin' me? We're on a roll.

614
00:31:46,469 --> 00:31:48,067
It's like, we're playing
with house money now.

615
00:31:48,069 --> 00:31:50,433
What else...
What else can we get away with?

616
00:31:50,435 --> 00:31:52,469
You know what's super hot?
Being poor.

617
00:32:09,969 --> 00:32:11,734
- He stole it.
- You can't take...

618
00:32:11,736 --> 00:32:12,967
- Hello. Good morning. Hi.
- He doesn't even need it.

619
00:32:12,969 --> 00:32:13,901
- Hey. Hi.
- Hey.

620
00:32:13,903 --> 00:32:15,367
Hey. Look who's here?

621
00:32:15,369 --> 00:32:16,600
- Hi, guys! Hi! Hi, guys.
- Dad?

622
00:32:16,602 --> 00:32:17,967
I thought Mom
was taking us to school.

623
00:32:17,969 --> 00:32:19,367
- Yeah, me too.
- Yeah, I know.

624
00:32:19,369 --> 00:32:21,400
But maybe
there's a surprise outside

625
00:32:21,402 --> 00:32:22,901
and maybe this
has something to do with it.

626
00:32:22,903 --> 00:32:24,067
Is that a new car?

627
00:32:24,069 --> 00:32:25,367
I don't know if the term "car"

628
00:32:25,369 --> 00:32:26,534
really does it
any kind of justice.

629
00:32:26,536 --> 00:32:27,833
- Alex.
- Let's go. It's right outside.

630
00:32:27,835 --> 00:32:28,667
Let's go, let's go, let's go.
Come check it out.

631
00:32:28,669 --> 00:32:29,300
Hold on!
We're eating breakfast here.

632
00:32:29,302 --> 00:32:30,769
Come on, here we go.

633
00:32:32,435 --> 00:32:34,101
- This is sick.
- Look at that!

634
00:32:34,103 --> 00:32:35,867
Oh, wait, wait, wait.

635
00:32:35,869 --> 00:32:36,967
- Hey! Hold on a second!
- Whoa, this is cool.

636
00:32:36,969 --> 00:32:38,034
- Hang on. Let me get your mom.
- Whoa. This is cool.

637
00:32:38,036 --> 00:32:40,867
- What? What did you do?
- I am gonna immortalize

638
00:32:40,869 --> 00:32:43,600
the first moment that you
lay eyes on this beauty.

639
00:32:43,602 --> 00:32:45,001
This is not how it's gonna work.

640
00:32:45,003 --> 00:32:46,734
Look at this thing.
This gives you the morning off.

641
00:32:46,736 --> 00:32:48,867
From what?
The morning off from what?

642
00:32:48,869 --> 00:32:50,667
I don't know. The Olympics
are here in two years.

643
00:32:50,669 --> 00:32:51,967
What?

644
00:32:51,969 --> 00:32:52,800
Who knows
what you're capable of?

645
00:32:52,802 --> 00:32:54,634
- What did you say?
- All right.

646
00:32:54,636 --> 00:32:57,602
The fucking Olympics?
Does he think that's funny?

647
00:32:58,335 --> 00:32:59,667
Fuck him.

648
00:32:59,669 --> 00:33:01,702
I mean, does he think
this is about me?

649
00:33:02,836 --> 00:33:04,669
No, 'cause it's not.

650
00:33:05,569 --> 00:33:08,502
No, he didn't say it.
He never says anything.

651
00:33:08,936 --> 00:33:10,502
I mean, isn't that typical?

652
00:33:10,702 --> 00:33:13,036
My God, you should know,
you're his mom!

653
00:33:14,335 --> 00:33:15,435
Marilyn!

654
00:33:16,036 --> 00:33:17,634
- Hey.
- I rang the doorbell.

655
00:33:17,636 --> 00:33:19,734
I hate the phone.

656
00:33:19,736 --> 00:33:21,333
I just wanted to see you.

657
00:33:21,335 --> 00:33:22,534
- Come inside. You're sweet.
- No, no, no.

658
00:33:22,536 --> 00:33:24,001
Jan doesn't even know
I left the house.

659
00:33:24,003 --> 00:33:25,400
I gotta get right back.

660
00:33:25,402 --> 00:33:27,367
- Okay.
- I just...

661
00:33:27,369 --> 00:33:28,667
You're both in shock.

662
00:33:28,669 --> 00:33:30,034
- Yeah.
- That's all.

663
00:33:30,036 --> 00:33:31,433
It's okay.

664
00:33:31,435 --> 00:33:33,101
And I just wanted
to tell you one thing.

665
00:33:33,103 --> 00:33:35,534
- Okay.
- Well, two things.

666
00:33:35,536 --> 00:33:36,602
One...

667
00:33:38,736 --> 00:33:41,936
Give yourself the grace...

668
00:33:42,903 --> 00:33:44,636
to feel what you feel.

669
00:33:45,569 --> 00:33:47,001
Unfiltered.

670
00:33:47,003 --> 00:33:48,636
And number two...

671
00:33:50,335 --> 00:33:52,667
The Olympics are here
in two years.

672
00:33:52,669 --> 00:33:54,333
Oh, my God.

673
00:33:54,335 --> 00:33:55,869
Marilyn, fuck you!

674
00:33:58,369 --> 00:33:59,934
- But I get it.
- Do you?

675
00:33:59,936 --> 00:34:01,001
I get it.

676
00:34:01,003 --> 00:34:03,003
I think so. Come here.

677
00:34:06,736 --> 00:34:07,768
Are you gonna start fucking?

678
00:34:07,770 --> 00:34:08,667
Immediately.

679
00:34:08,669 --> 00:34:10,367
Yes!

680
00:34:10,369 --> 00:34:11,901
New dick. That's what you need.

681
00:34:11,903 --> 00:34:13,433
Some new deep dickin' too.

682
00:34:13,435 --> 00:34:14,667
No pity fucks.

683
00:34:14,669 --> 00:34:16,500
Maybe that's what you need.

684
00:34:16,502 --> 00:34:18,400
It's like the one good thing
Balls and I have left.

685
00:34:18,402 --> 00:34:19,402
Really?

686
00:34:19,736 --> 00:34:21,600
Y'all ever fuck sober?

687
00:34:21,602 --> 00:34:23,600
No. I hate him too much
to be able to do that.

688
00:34:23,602 --> 00:34:24,770
Well, that's a red flag.

689
00:34:25,602 --> 00:34:26,669
No duh.

690
00:34:26,969 --> 00:34:28,669
Hey.

691
00:34:29,569 --> 00:34:31,469
I'm gonna play
for a club team, again.

692
00:34:32,903 --> 00:34:35,602
And I've been reaching out
to people about coaching.

693
00:34:36,402 --> 00:34:38,869
- I just worry.
- About what?

694
00:34:39,469 --> 00:34:41,836
Look, you have a full life.

695
00:34:42,435 --> 00:34:45,500
You're not defined by this
one amazing thing you did.

696
00:34:45,502 --> 00:34:47,435
So, I just hope...

697
00:34:47,936 --> 00:34:52,067
that enough time has passed that
you can re-enter this world,

698
00:34:52,069 --> 00:34:53,934
without giving it
too much meaning.

699
00:34:53,936 --> 00:34:55,667
Yeah, but I'm not gonna
be able to do that

700
00:34:55,669 --> 00:34:56,934
now that you said it out loud.

701
00:34:56,936 --> 00:34:58,567
I'm just reminding you, babe,

702
00:34:58,569 --> 00:35:00,001
you have done
other amazing things.

703
00:35:00,003 --> 00:35:00,967
Like?

704
00:35:00,969 --> 00:35:02,901
Like being a mother.

705
00:35:02,903 --> 00:35:04,567
Like this house.

706
00:35:04,569 --> 00:35:07,069
I don't give a fuck
about volleyball. You're great.

707
00:35:28,737 --> 00:35:29,869
Come on, puppies.

708
00:35:31,435 --> 00:35:32,669
Come on, babies.

709
00:35:34,369 --> 00:35:36,634
Come on, Charlie.
Charlie, come to me.

710
00:35:36,636 --> 00:35:38,402
Come, Charlie. Yeah.

711
00:35:38,903 --> 00:35:40,602
Yes, baby.

712
00:35:42,369 --> 00:35:43,469
Come on. Come on.

713
00:35:44,402 --> 00:35:45,636
Yeah.

714
00:36:01,402 --> 00:36:03,433
- Don't move.
- Hi, Mom.

715
00:36:03,435 --> 00:36:05,067
- Hey.
- Are you lice free yet?

716
00:36:05,069 --> 00:36:07,569
- Yeah, I mean, I got it, but...
- Mom. Mom, mom, mom!

717
00:36:07,836 --> 00:36:09,770
This guy's good.
I'm just checking this guy.

718
00:36:10,402 --> 00:36:11,867
We're probably gonna have
to check each other.

719
00:36:11,869 --> 00:36:13,534
- He's gonna give you lice.
- Ew, that's disgusting.

720
00:36:13,536 --> 00:36:15,433
I gotta see if we...

721
00:36:15,435 --> 00:36:17,067
I can't tell if that's
dandruff or...

722
00:36:17,069 --> 00:36:18,967
You got some more paper towels?

723
00:36:18,969 --> 00:36:21,101
I do have more paper towels.
Just did a Costco run.

724
00:36:21,103 --> 00:36:22,867
There should some
in the bedroom in the back.

725
00:36:22,869 --> 00:36:24,433
All right.

726
00:36:24,435 --> 00:36:25,635
- Dad, why do you have...
- See what I mean?

727
00:36:25,637 --> 00:36:27,034
Why are they
in a doctor's office?

728
00:36:27,036 --> 00:36:29,969
So, you...
using our old armoire?

729
00:36:31,036 --> 00:36:33,433
Yeah, I took it out of storage
until I get some more furniture.

730
00:36:33,435 --> 00:36:34,534
Why, you want me to put it back?

731
00:36:34,536 --> 00:36:36,034
Immediately.

732
00:36:36,036 --> 00:36:38,500
No, it's just that hadn't talked
about that kind of stuff.

733
00:36:38,502 --> 00:36:40,567
Yeah. Sorry. Probably
should have asked first.

734
00:36:40,569 --> 00:36:41,903
It's fine.

735
00:36:42,969 --> 00:36:45,500
So, what do you think
about your new style?

736
00:36:45,502 --> 00:36:46,768
You know what,
I gotta get more paper towels.

737
00:36:46,770 --> 00:36:47,901
I think we should
just go with this.

738
00:36:47,903 --> 00:36:48,834
- All the time.
- Don't move. Don't move.

739
00:36:48,836 --> 00:36:50,500
- All right?
- Don't move.

740
00:36:50,502 --> 00:36:50,969
You're lice-free,
and we'll just keep this look.

741
00:36:55,803 --> 00:36:57,467
I think I might have lice.

742
00:36:57,469 --> 00:36:59,001
Hmm.

743
00:36:59,003 --> 00:37:01,034
Any... Aren't you seeing it
jump off me? Why are you...

744
00:37:01,036 --> 00:37:02,534
Yeah, let's get you
in the chair.

745
00:37:02,536 --> 00:37:04,001
I think that's what we gotta do.

746
00:37:04,003 --> 00:37:05,635
Yeah, you look...
One just crawled in between...

747
00:37:05,637 --> 00:37:07,367
- No...
- Mom's pregnant.

748
00:37:07,369 --> 00:37:08,433
- You are so pregnant.
- What?

749
00:37:08,435 --> 00:37:09,768
You hooked up with a bug.

750
00:37:09,770 --> 00:37:11,668
- All right, guys, enough.
- Guys.

751
00:37:11,670 --> 00:37:12,967
But Dad, that's how
you said you get lice.

752
00:37:12,969 --> 00:37:14,668
- Yeah... yeah.
- Oh, is that how you said it?

753
00:37:14,670 --> 00:37:17,400
No. It's bec... It was a joke,
because the video said

754
00:37:17,402 --> 00:37:18,568
we're looking
for baby eggs, all right?

755
00:37:18,570 --> 00:37:19,834
It was a joke.

756
00:37:19,836 --> 00:37:21,433
- Did you hook up with a bug?
- No.

757
00:37:21,435 --> 00:37:23,668
- Well, you've got lice so...
- Yeah, you did.

758
00:37:23,670 --> 00:37:25,635
<i>-You hooked up with a bug</i>
-You promised not to tell them.

759
00:37:25,637 --> 00:37:27,867
- You have lice, too.
- Yeah, sorry. I couldn't resist.

760
00:37:27,869 --> 00:37:29,333
All right, you know what?
You guys need to rehearse.

761
00:37:29,335 --> 00:37:30,934
- Let's go. Let's go.
- Okay.

762
00:37:30,936 --> 00:37:32,534
- Get busy.
- I already know it.

763
00:37:32,536 --> 00:37:34,768
- Keep the volume down, too.
- Turn the volume up? Okay.

764
00:37:34,770 --> 00:37:36,333
No, not up.
Keep the volume down.

765
00:37:36,335 --> 00:37:37,001
Dad, do you know where
the loudspeaker is?

766
00:37:37,003 --> 00:37:38,101
I'm serious about the volume

767
00:37:38,103 --> 00:37:39,834
So you're really
not seeing anything?

768
00:37:39,836 --> 00:37:42,435
- There's no little bites or...
- I don't think so.

769
00:37:42,936 --> 00:37:44,601
To be honest, just looking...

770
00:37:44,603 --> 00:37:46,067
Now, it's making me itch.
I think I...

771
00:37:46,069 --> 00:37:47,402
I must have it.
Would you check me?

772
00:37:47,969 --> 00:37:49,069
Sure.

773
00:37:51,335 --> 00:37:52,934
You can get
like little bites or...

774
00:37:52,936 --> 00:37:54,967
Yeah, make sure to really check.

775
00:37:54,969 --> 00:37:56,535
Yeah.

776
00:37:56,537 --> 00:37:58,302
"Under Pressure"?

777
00:37:59,369 --> 00:38:01,335
Oh. That's what that is.

778
00:38:02,537 --> 00:38:03,934
You didn't recognize it?

779
00:38:03,936 --> 00:38:06,367
No. The first 40 million times
I didn't recognize it.

780
00:38:06,369 --> 00:38:07,836
They're obsessed.

781
00:38:08,469 --> 00:38:09,668
It's all they talk about.

782
00:38:09,670 --> 00:38:11,333
That performance
is so far from now too.

783
00:38:11,335 --> 00:38:13,467
I wonder where they get
their work ethic from.

784
00:38:13,469 --> 00:38:15,036
Mm. Poor boys.

785
00:38:16,069 --> 00:38:18,003
Just check one more in here.

786
00:38:22,003 --> 00:38:26,570
I'm gonna dip my toe
into the coaching world.

787
00:38:28,836 --> 00:38:30,402
Is that why you were
in the city?

788
00:38:31,369 --> 00:38:33,570
No. I was in the city
'cause you called me.

789
00:38:34,936 --> 00:38:36,901
Oh. I just figured
you were in the city,

790
00:38:36,903 --> 00:38:38,668
because you said
you'd come right over.

791
00:38:38,670 --> 00:38:40,834
Yeah. I wanted to see
the halfway house

792
00:38:40,836 --> 00:38:42,635
our kids are living in
part time.

793
00:38:42,637 --> 00:38:44,101
I'm glad you got
the vibe that I'm going for.

794
00:38:44,103 --> 00:38:45,570
Yeah, you did great.

795
00:38:46,335 --> 00:38:49,402
I haven't talked
to any programs yet, just...

796
00:38:52,335 --> 00:38:53,668
I think that's great.

797
00:38:53,670 --> 00:38:55,503
Any program would die
to have you, I'm sure.

798
00:38:56,069 --> 00:38:57,570
Yeah.

799
00:38:58,003 --> 00:38:59,069
I think it's great, too.

800
00:39:01,737 --> 00:39:03,869
Um, I think you're good.

801
00:39:04,936 --> 00:39:06,503
Good. Okay.

802
00:39:07,670 --> 00:39:09,034
Do you wanna
take a shower with...

803
00:39:09,036 --> 00:39:11,601
and rinse off with some of that
special shampoo?

804
00:39:11,603 --> 00:39:12,701
Oh, oh...

805
00:39:12,703 --> 00:39:13,601
- Might as well.
- Yeah.

806
00:39:13,603 --> 00:39:14,867
Yeah, yeah, yeah.

807
00:39:14,869 --> 00:39:16,503
Bathroom's right down there
on the left.

808
00:40:02,603 --> 00:40:03,969
You got this.

809
00:40:05,670 --> 00:40:07,101
So I read that the number one

810
00:40:07,103 --> 00:40:08,468
fantasy for guys...

811
00:40:08,470 --> 00:40:09,168
- Can I help you?
- Hey, man.

812
00:40:09,170 --> 00:40:10,768
Yeah, I'm here for the open mic.

813
00:40:10,770 --> 00:40:12,468
Yeah, right here. Just write
your name down there.

814
00:40:12,470 --> 00:40:13,434
Okay.

815
00:40:13,436 --> 00:40:14,470
You're next.

816
00:40:14,637 --> 00:40:15,770
- I'm next?
- Yup, be ready.

817
00:40:16,570 --> 00:40:17,801
Fuck.

818
00:40:17,803 --> 00:40:18,901
I'm getting the light,
so I gotta go.

819
00:40:18,903 --> 00:40:20,067
Oh, the light. The light.

820
00:40:20,069 --> 00:40:21,537
The light. Yeah, the light.

821
00:40:34,869 --> 00:40:36,670
Ladies and gentlemen...

822
00:40:40,003 --> 00:40:41,468
<i>- Yo, man. What's up?
- Hey.</i>

823
00:40:41,470 --> 00:40:42,701
I was actually hoping
that I could just,

824
00:40:42,703 --> 00:40:44,001
you know,
watch and hang tonight?

825
00:40:44,003 --> 00:40:46,601
- Yeah.
- Yeah? I got 15 bucks on me.

826
00:40:46,603 --> 00:40:49,368
Nah. Keep your 15 bucks.
Get yourself something nice.

827
00:40:49,370 --> 00:40:50,967
- Go on in.
- Thanks, man.

828
00:40:50,969 --> 00:40:53,570
You got it... Just... Yeah, just
finish that before you go in.

829
00:40:54,637 --> 00:40:56,036
- Finish it?
- Yeah.

830
00:40:56,969 --> 00:40:59,434
- Hey.
- Hey.

831
00:40:59,436 --> 00:41:00,470
- There he is.
- Make yourself comfortable.

832
00:41:01,036 --> 00:41:02,635
Am I okay here?

833
00:41:02,637 --> 00:41:04,535
- Yeah. No one's sittin' here.
- You're fine.

834
00:41:04,537 --> 00:41:05,603
How was your night?

835
00:41:06,036 --> 00:41:07,503
It was pretty good.

836
00:41:07,836 --> 00:41:10,737
I went and did
a different open mic and...

837
00:41:12,836 --> 00:41:14,334
Yeah.

838
00:41:14,336 --> 00:41:15,801
You know, I've been
doing this for 25 years.

839
00:41:15,803 --> 00:41:17,067
You know what I mean?
And I love it.

840
00:41:17,069 --> 00:41:18,535
I wouldn't wanna be
anywhere else.

841
00:41:18,537 --> 00:41:20,568
But what I like about you
is you're so innocent.

842
00:41:20,570 --> 00:41:21,768
You're not naive,
you're innocent.

843
00:41:21,770 --> 00:41:23,067
And that's why it works.

844
00:41:23,069 --> 00:41:24,668
So that's good.
It comes outta your head,

845
00:41:24,670 --> 00:41:26,001
you put it on a piece of paper,
and you get up there.

846
00:41:26,003 --> 00:41:28,067
It's like therapy.
But, people can relate to that.

847
00:41:28,069 --> 00:41:29,368
- I don't know what it is.
- You don't know anything.

848
00:41:29,370 --> 00:41:30,967
But I just do know
that coming here

849
00:41:30,969 --> 00:41:33,568
- has ended up making me feel...
- Yeah. It's a safe space.

850
00:41:33,570 --> 00:41:34,537
- Well, a lot better.
- Yeah.

851
00:41:35,537 --> 00:41:36,535
You are good...
I mean, you're bad at stand-up,

852
00:41:36,537 --> 00:41:37,967
but you're good.

853
00:41:37,969 --> 00:41:40,601
You have a good heart.
You seem like a pure...

854
00:41:40,603 --> 00:41:42,434
like I believe you that
you just found this thing,

855
00:41:42,436 --> 00:41:44,568
and now you're in love
with stand-up.

856
00:41:44,570 --> 00:41:47,034
Other than the fact that
I'm really insulted, thank you.

857
00:41:47,036 --> 00:41:49,535
But you're bad.
You're really bad.

858
00:41:49,537 --> 00:41:50,801
Okay.

859
00:41:50,803 --> 00:41:52,334
So I was waxing.
It didn't hurt, right?

860
00:41:52,336 --> 00:41:54,001
And then she finished
really quickly,

861
00:41:54,003 --> 00:41:55,601
like I didn't even
know what happened.

862
00:41:55,603 --> 00:41:58,470
And I was like, she goes,
"Your triangle's done." Okay.

863
00:41:58,836 --> 00:42:00,834
"Your triangle's done."

864
00:42:00,836 --> 00:42:02,067
What she gave me...

865
00:42:02,069 --> 00:42:03,903
Okay, wait.
Can I use your napkin?

866
00:42:05,370 --> 00:42:08,101
What I was expecting was this.

867
00:42:08,103 --> 00:42:10,470
This is what,
what I was expecting. Okay?

868
00:42:10,703 --> 00:42:13,601
You see this?
Reasonable. Reasonable.

869
00:42:13,603 --> 00:42:15,969
What she gave me...

870
00:42:23,603 --> 00:42:24,670
is this.

871
00:42:25,570 --> 00:42:28,067
- It is ridi... Look at this.
- No!

872
00:42:28,069 --> 00:42:29,801
Look at what I'm showing you.

873
00:42:29,803 --> 00:42:32,735
I'm not... This is not...
It is tiny.

874
00:42:32,737 --> 00:42:34,770
Well, I brought
my drink up. Um...

875
00:42:35,470 --> 00:42:37,034
- It's okay.
- Is that all right?

876
00:42:37,036 --> 00:42:38,834
Hang on. Do you guys mind?
I'm gonna put this right here.

877
00:42:38,836 --> 00:42:40,468
Use it!

878
00:42:40,470 --> 00:42:42,967
You okay? I'm watching it,
all right? So, don't...

879
00:42:42,969 --> 00:42:44,867
Oh, please roofie me.

880
00:42:44,869 --> 00:42:46,368
Oh.

881
00:42:46,370 --> 00:42:48,501
Please, I'd love
to get roofie'd tonight.

882
00:42:48,503 --> 00:42:50,370
Please!

883
00:42:50,803 --> 00:42:53,967
Hey, is it true that you do
magic? Is that a true story?

884
00:42:53,969 --> 00:42:56,101
Yes. That is my day job.

885
00:42:56,103 --> 00:42:58,568
One of my kids,
he's obsessed with-with magic.

886
00:42:58,570 --> 00:43:00,067
- Oh, no.
- Yeah, his birthday's coming up,

887
00:43:00,069 --> 00:43:01,468
and his mom's doing this thing,

888
00:43:01,470 --> 00:43:02,735
and I want to kinda
add something to it.

889
00:43:02,737 --> 00:43:05,368
Would you ever consider doing
something like that? Is that...?

890
00:43:05,370 --> 00:43:06,934
- Uh, yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah.
- Yeah?

891
00:43:06,936 --> 00:43:07,869
- I'd be down. Sure.
- Okay.

892
00:43:14,403 --> 00:43:15,570
The driveway's okay?

893
00:43:17,770 --> 00:43:20,403
Okay in front of the driveway.
They're not going anywhere.

894
00:43:30,637 --> 00:43:32,036
Shit doesn't even look gold.

895
00:43:33,670 --> 00:43:34,869
I should have picked
the balloons.

896
00:43:38,670 --> 00:43:40,537
What?

897
00:43:40,869 --> 00:43:42,434
- Hey!
- Hey. Hey.

898
00:43:42,436 --> 00:43:43,535
What are you doing out here?
The door was open.

899
00:43:43,537 --> 00:43:44,101
I didn't know
what the protocol was.

900
00:43:44,103 --> 00:43:45,601
What? Get in here.

901
00:43:45,603 --> 00:43:47,768
You guys all right?

902
00:43:47,770 --> 00:43:49,101
Wow.

903
00:43:49,103 --> 00:43:50,701
- It's gonna be so good.
- You really went all out.

904
00:43:50,703 --> 00:43:52,936
Hey, will you help me actually
put some more food out?

905
00:43:53,670 --> 00:43:55,368
<i>Crudités</i> in the fridge.

906
00:43:55,370 --> 00:43:56,801
- There's two of 'em.
- Okay.

907
00:43:56,803 --> 00:43:58,735
I just really need the carrots

908
00:43:58,737 --> 00:44:00,501
because they have
not touched one vegetable.

909
00:44:00,503 --> 00:44:03,701
Hi, buddy. Oh, hey. Hi, hi, hi.
You having fun?

910
00:44:03,703 --> 00:44:04,934
- Yeah.
- Yeah? How's the magician?

911
00:44:04,936 --> 00:44:06,069
- Good.
- Yeah?

912
00:44:06,603 --> 00:44:08,701
Your father's sorry
he couldn't make it.

913
00:44:08,703 --> 00:44:10,735
- He's on one of his walks.
- Okay.

914
00:44:10,737 --> 00:44:13,436
Hey! There he is.

915
00:44:14,803 --> 00:44:16,403
Hey, Charlie doesn't like
to be picked up.

916
00:44:17,103 --> 00:44:18,601
Is that his name?

917
00:44:18,603 --> 00:44:19,568
Yeah. Did you really
not know Charlie's name?

918
00:44:19,570 --> 00:44:20,901
No.

919
00:44:20,903 --> 00:44:22,668
- After all this time?
- Dude, you look so good.

920
00:44:22,670 --> 00:44:23,867
- For real?
- Yeah, yeah.

921
00:44:23,869 --> 00:44:25,568
Is that... You look...
Did you lose weight?

922
00:44:25,570 --> 00:44:26,867
Is that a new sweater?

923
00:44:26,869 --> 00:44:29,334
Honestly, no,
I've had this sweater for...

924
00:44:29,336 --> 00:44:30,768
Well, you should
keep wearing it.

925
00:44:30,770 --> 00:44:32,501
It's the guilt
eating away at you, I'm sure.

926
00:44:32,503 --> 00:44:33,768
- The guilt?
- Christine.

927
00:44:33,770 --> 00:44:34,834
- What?
- Don't say that.

928
00:44:34,836 --> 00:44:36,535
What?

929
00:44:36,537 --> 00:44:38,401
Guilt about what? What are you
talking about, Christine?

930
00:44:38,403 --> 00:44:39,701
Is that your name?

931
00:44:39,703 --> 00:44:41,635
Christine, have I done
something to offend you?

932
00:44:41,637 --> 00:44:44,067
Because if I have, or like upset
you or something, then I'm...

933
00:44:44,069 --> 00:44:45,535
No, no, no. You know what?
Forget it.

934
00:44:45,537 --> 00:44:46,735
I'm not going to Oyster Bay.

935
00:44:46,737 --> 00:44:47,635
Don't apologize to me. What?

936
00:44:47,637 --> 00:44:48,701
- Guys.
- Why not?

937
00:44:48,703 --> 00:44:49,967
- It's a birthday party.
- Because.

938
00:44:49,969 --> 00:44:51,501
Go! Run, run, run!

939
00:44:51,503 --> 00:44:52,836
Go Judey, go Judey, go Jude!

940
00:44:54,737 --> 00:44:56,568
Oh, you got my... She got my...

941
00:44:56,570 --> 00:44:58,434
You're gonna be
part of this trick, okay?

942
00:44:58,436 --> 00:44:59,601
- All right.
- Can all three of us do it?

943
00:44:59,603 --> 00:45:00,768
- Yeah.
- Yeah,

944
00:45:00,770 --> 00:45:02,403
all three of you can do it.
Okay.

945
00:45:02,703 --> 00:45:05,069
- I think I took too much.
- Honey. Oh.

946
00:45:06,737 --> 00:45:08,903
I didn't... I didn't know
I was holding the dog.

947
00:45:10,003 --> 00:45:11,637
Well, this is pretty good.

948
00:45:12,936 --> 00:45:15,403
I'm not the reason you're
not coming to Oyster Bay, am I?

949
00:45:16,770 --> 00:45:18,034
Oh, God, no. Not at all.

950
00:45:18,036 --> 00:45:19,668
I mean, 'cause we can all go.

951
00:45:19,670 --> 00:45:21,368
It doesn't have to be awkward.
Right?

952
00:45:21,370 --> 00:45:24,368
No... you mean like it is now?

953
00:45:24,370 --> 00:45:27,102
Hey, sorry that
I just kinda lost it earlier.

954
00:45:27,104 --> 00:45:28,067
I felt really attacked
by all those guys.

955
00:45:28,069 --> 00:45:29,901
Yeah.

956
00:45:29,903 --> 00:45:30,801
I mean, why are we even talking
about Oyster Bay now at all?

957
00:45:30,803 --> 00:45:32,768
- I know.
- It's so far away.

958
00:45:32,770 --> 00:45:34,102
- They're crazy.
- Those guys,

959
00:45:34,104 --> 00:45:35,468
you know they're psychos
when it comes to planning.

960
00:45:35,470 --> 00:45:37,535
Yes.

961
00:45:37,537 --> 00:45:40,034
All I know is we made
a couple wonderful boys.

962
00:45:40,036 --> 00:45:41,603
Right?

963
00:45:42,070 --> 00:45:43,470
Yeah.

964
00:45:45,503 --> 00:45:50,801
<i>♪ Happy birthday, dear Jude ♪</i>

965
00:45:50,803 --> 00:45:55,603
<i>♪ Happy birthday to you ♪</i>

966
00:46:44,703 --> 00:46:47,570
- You got it all over you.
- I know! I...

967
00:46:48,004 --> 00:46:49,969
You got it all over you, too.

968
00:46:50,637 --> 00:46:52,867
What does that have to do
with, like, opening wine?

969
00:46:52,869 --> 00:46:54,336
- Hi.
- Hi.

970
00:46:54,803 --> 00:46:55,934
Thank you so much for coming.

971
00:46:55,936 --> 00:46:56,401
Thank you so much for having me.

972
00:46:56,403 --> 00:46:58,002
You were awesome.

973
00:46:58,004 --> 00:46:59,035
- Yeah, I really appreciate it.
- The kids loved it.

974
00:46:59,037 --> 00:47:00,068
- Hey, that was amazing.
- Thank you. Thank you.

975
00:47:00,070 --> 00:47:01,102
Oh. My balance is off.

976
00:47:01,104 --> 00:47:02,468
- Nice to meet you.
- You okay?

977
00:47:02,470 --> 00:47:02,934
- This is my buddy.
- Nice to meet you.

978
00:47:02,936 --> 00:47:03,901
Balls.

979
00:47:03,903 --> 00:47:05,468
- Balls?
- Yeah.

980
00:47:05,470 --> 00:47:06,934
Cool. Okay.

981
00:47:06,936 --> 00:47:07,901
Happens every time.

982
00:47:07,903 --> 00:47:09,004
Don't make my mom do that.

983
00:47:10,637 --> 00:47:12,834
- What happens every time?
- Nothin'.

984
00:47:12,836 --> 00:47:13,970
Okay, what's the deal?

985
00:47:15,737 --> 00:47:17,401
You mean with
why you still have that beard

986
00:47:17,403 --> 00:47:18,635
even though the play's
been over for two months?

987
00:47:18,637 --> 00:47:20,401
I can't choose
when the character leaves me.

988
00:47:20,403 --> 00:47:21,701
Characters, you mean.

989
00:47:21,703 --> 00:47:23,934
Actually, I feel like
maybe it's providing,

990
00:47:23,936 --> 00:47:25,867
like, a new thing
for casting directors,

991
00:47:25,869 --> 00:47:27,768
now that I'm working again.
Thank you for coming by the way.

992
00:47:27,770 --> 00:47:29,468
Twice. I came twice.

993
00:47:29,470 --> 00:47:30,867
And you didn't even go on
the second time.

994
00:47:30,869 --> 00:47:32,568
I know.

995
00:47:32,570 --> 00:47:36,068
It's because that asshole Paul
said he was gonna be sick

996
00:47:36,070 --> 00:47:37,568
and then he showed up anyway.

997
00:47:37,570 --> 00:47:40,434
But I was psyched because
he got St. Paul sick,

998
00:47:40,436 --> 00:47:41,668
and I went up
for two weeks straight.

999
00:47:41,670 --> 00:47:43,401
- It was amazing.
- Yeah, that's a bonus.

1000
00:47:43,403 --> 00:47:44,867
And people said
that I was, like...

1001
00:47:44,869 --> 00:47:46,468
- Yeah.
- Better.

1002
00:47:46,470 --> 00:47:47,601
- Than him?
- Yeah.

1003
00:47:47,603 --> 00:47:48,768
Yeah. I bet.

1004
00:47:48,770 --> 00:47:50,468
- I got recognized on the street.
- Did you?

1005
00:47:50,470 --> 00:47:52,501
Somebody literally thought
I was a disciple. It was great.

1006
00:47:52,503 --> 00:47:54,737
But I think maybe they were,
like, a Jesus freak. But...

1007
00:47:55,436 --> 00:47:56,867
They're not a fan
of the play necessarily.

1008
00:47:56,869 --> 00:47:58,635
Well, they saw the play a lot.

1009
00:47:58,637 --> 00:48:01,935
I think they saw the play almost
all the two weeks that I did it.

1010
00:48:01,937 --> 00:48:04,002
So, I didn't really tell them
that I was the understudy.

1011
00:48:04,004 --> 00:48:05,768
- But anyway, this is about you.
- Right.

1012
00:48:05,770 --> 00:48:08,803
Don't fucking... Don't fucking
change the subject.

1013
00:48:10,903 --> 00:48:11,869
Let me rephrase it.

1014
00:48:13,070 --> 00:48:14,836
What's the deal, man?

1015
00:48:15,903 --> 00:48:17,803
Yeah, I don't know what to
tell you, man. There is no deal.

1016
00:48:18,470 --> 00:48:19,603
Okay.

1017
00:48:20,104 --> 00:48:21,470
You don't want to tell me
her name?

1018
00:48:23,670 --> 00:48:24,503
All right.

1019
00:48:26,869 --> 00:48:28,035
If I tell you something, you
promise you won't tell anybody?

1020
00:48:28,037 --> 00:48:29,637
No. Keep going.
What's her name?

1021
00:48:31,603 --> 00:48:32,869
I've been doing stand-up.

1022
00:48:33,537 --> 00:48:34,735
Oh.

1023
00:48:34,737 --> 00:48:36,035
I don't know who that is.

1024
00:48:36,037 --> 00:48:37,735
That's a crazy handle.
What? Is she famous?

1025
00:48:37,737 --> 00:48:39,368
No, no, no. Dude,

1026
00:48:39,370 --> 00:48:41,701
I've been doing stand-up comedy
on stage downtown.

1027
00:48:41,703 --> 00:48:42,603
Okay.

1028
00:48:43,737 --> 00:48:44,968
What?

1029
00:48:44,970 --> 00:48:46,004
Is it like a hobby?

1030
00:48:47,770 --> 00:48:50,002
Well, I'm not about to
quit my job and go on tour.

1031
00:48:50,004 --> 00:48:50,869
Okay.

1032
00:48:53,603 --> 00:48:55,701
Yeah. It's just,
I-I mean, I love it, man.

1033
00:48:55,703 --> 00:48:58,601
It's great. I... You know,
it's actually pretty amazing.

1034
00:48:58,603 --> 00:49:01,535
And it's terrifying,
but I love every aspect of it,

1035
00:49:01,537 --> 00:49:03,468
and it's something
I look forward to.

1036
00:49:03,470 --> 00:49:04,570
- Fuck.
- What?

1037
00:49:09,970 --> 00:49:10,803
I knew it.

1038
00:49:12,436 --> 00:49:13,070
Knew what?

1039
00:49:14,703 --> 00:49:16,870
Just like...

1040
00:49:19,904 --> 00:49:22,635
You've always been the funniest
guy in the room forever, right?

1041
00:49:22,637 --> 00:49:24,035
Ever since college,

1042
00:49:24,037 --> 00:49:25,601
and now that you're actually
fucking pursuing it...

1043
00:49:25,603 --> 00:49:26,835
I'm not pursing anything.

1044
00:49:26,837 --> 00:49:28,603
You're gonna kill it.
It's inevitable.

1045
00:49:29,370 --> 00:49:34,070
And it kills me that I hate it
so much because I-I have...

1046
00:49:34,703 --> 00:49:36,401
always gotten comfort

1047
00:49:36,403 --> 00:49:37,601
in knowing that you settled.

1048
00:49:37,603 --> 00:49:38,870
That you're a settler.

1049
00:49:40,570 --> 00:49:43,370
And I-I'm the guy who...

1050
00:49:44,870 --> 00:49:47,434
Even though, you know, is
going for it. That's my thing.

1051
00:49:47,436 --> 00:49:49,002
Jesus, Balls.

1052
00:49:49,004 --> 00:49:51,068
I know. It's been a lot
for me to carry around.

1053
00:49:51,070 --> 00:49:52,801
Just so nothing
gets misconstrued,

1054
00:49:52,803 --> 00:49:54,068
I don't have a girlfriend.

1055
00:49:54,070 --> 00:49:55,835
- Oh, you do whatever you want.
- I don't.

1056
00:49:55,837 --> 00:49:56,935
Look, it doesn't matter.

1057
00:49:56,937 --> 00:49:58,102
You don't have to
justify yourself.

1058
00:49:58,104 --> 00:49:59,768
You're famous now, anyway.
So, whatevs.

1059
00:49:59,770 --> 00:50:01,002
What are you talking about, man?

1060
00:50:01,004 --> 00:50:02,535
Look, you don't have
to justify yourself.

1061
00:50:02,537 --> 00:50:03,603
Listen to me. To anybody.

1062
00:50:03,937 --> 00:50:05,601
Not to Tess, not to anybody.

1063
00:50:05,603 --> 00:50:08,336
Just like Tess doesn't
have to justify herself to you.

1064
00:50:09,037 --> 00:50:10,004
Justify what?

1065
00:50:12,470 --> 00:50:13,503
Nothing.

1066
00:50:13,937 --> 00:50:16,501
- Is Tess seeing someone?
- No.

1067
00:50:16,503 --> 00:50:17,701
I mean, is she open to it?

1068
00:50:17,703 --> 00:50:18,735
I wouldn't know.
I don't think so.

1069
00:50:18,737 --> 00:50:20,804
But is she? Yeah. Maybe.

1070
00:50:21,770 --> 00:50:22,935
Did Christine say something?

1071
00:50:22,937 --> 00:50:24,068
Who?

1072
00:50:24,070 --> 00:50:25,004
Christine?

1073
00:50:25,970 --> 00:50:27,068
Ab-About what?

1074
00:50:27,070 --> 00:50:28,601
About Tess seeing somebody.

1075
00:50:28,603 --> 00:50:29,637
No. Did she?

1076
00:50:30,004 --> 00:50:31,004
I'm asking you.

1077
00:50:32,870 --> 00:50:34,401
- What are you...
- Well, did you hear anything?

1078
00:50:34,403 --> 00:50:35,568
What did Christine say about it?

1079
00:50:35,570 --> 00:50:37,004
What did she say?

1080
00:50:37,436 --> 00:50:38,771
Dude, I'm asking you.

1081
00:50:43,370 --> 00:50:45,769
Hey, Olga? I just
put a bunch of trash there.

1082
00:50:45,771 --> 00:50:47,568
- Is there anything else?
- No. All good. Thank you.

1083
00:50:47,570 --> 00:50:49,336
Good. Okay. Thank you.

1084
00:50:52,670 --> 00:50:53,537
Hey.

1085
00:50:55,037 --> 00:50:56,570
- Yeah?
- Are you leaving?

1086
00:50:58,837 --> 00:51:00,403
I was just finishing
cleaning up.

1087
00:51:01,737 --> 00:51:03,070
Yeah, I-I gotta go.

1088
00:51:12,336 --> 00:51:13,403
How you doing?

1089
00:51:14,904 --> 00:51:16,070
All right.

1090
00:51:18,904 --> 00:51:21,368
Oh, man. I'm Alex.

1091
00:51:21,370 --> 00:51:22,637
How's everybody feeling tonight?

1092
00:51:23,703 --> 00:51:25,703
Good. I'm feeling pretty good.

1093
00:51:26,603 --> 00:51:29,968
I, uh... I'm recently separated
from my wife.

1094
00:51:29,970 --> 00:51:32,470
No. Oh, thank you.

1095
00:51:33,904 --> 00:51:38,668
And, uh, I think that
she's maybe seeing someone.

1096
00:51:38,670 --> 00:51:40,035
Yeah, I just found out
the possibility

1097
00:51:40,037 --> 00:51:41,501
that she's seeing someone,

1098
00:51:41,503 --> 00:51:43,334
and I'm handling it just fine,
I think.

1099
00:51:43,336 --> 00:51:45,635
Right? And, uh...

1100
00:51:45,637 --> 00:51:48,002
So I just made up
a list of, uh...

1101
00:51:48,004 --> 00:51:51,303
possible worst case scenarios,
which I think is really healthy.

1102
00:51:51,537 --> 00:51:53,035
Number one.

1103
00:51:53,037 --> 00:51:56,037
This guy is a radiologist.

1104
00:51:56,503 --> 00:52:00,271
Because that would mean
he's knowledgeable,

1105
00:52:00,738 --> 00:52:04,537
he's noble,
and he makes a ton of money.

1106
00:52:05,336 --> 00:52:08,935
Terrible. So, that's number one.
Number two. He surfs.

1107
00:52:08,937 --> 00:52:10,668
Because surfing
is so fucking cool,

1108
00:52:10,670 --> 00:52:13,769
and those guys seem like
they're really cool,

1109
00:52:13,771 --> 00:52:16,068
and that they, like,
can do anything,

1110
00:52:16,070 --> 00:52:18,769
and they drive old trucks.

1111
00:52:18,771 --> 00:52:21,436
You know, and they don't care,
they never wear shoes.

1112
00:52:22,004 --> 00:52:24,970
And, uh, they never met a jar
they couldn't open.

1113
00:52:25,470 --> 00:52:26,968
You know what I mean?

1114
00:52:26,970 --> 00:52:29,401
And they don't need to cut
their hair, or do anything.

1115
00:52:29,403 --> 00:52:31,837
And they're always suntanned.
Um...

1116
00:52:32,336 --> 00:52:34,401
And they look like they got
really strong forearms,

1117
00:52:34,403 --> 00:52:35,501
you know?

1118
00:52:35,503 --> 00:52:38,068
Which is, thinking about, um,

1119
00:52:38,070 --> 00:52:40,334
someone you love,
like a lady you love,

1120
00:52:40,336 --> 00:52:42,403
with a guy with
really strong forearms.

1121
00:52:43,738 --> 00:52:47,804
Uh, my forearms
are basically atrophied. Um...

1122
00:52:48,870 --> 00:52:51,470
No, that's not true. I actually
do work out a fair bit.

1123
00:52:52,370 --> 00:52:55,636
I've got, um,
what I would describe as, um,

1124
00:52:55,638 --> 00:52:57,837
and a lot of ladies would
describe, as a dad bod.

1125
00:53:00,671 --> 00:53:03,935
By the way, it occurs to me that
men have done a really good job

1126
00:53:03,937 --> 00:53:08,037
of convincing women
that dad bods are a good thing.

1127
00:53:08,704 --> 00:53:11,002
You know? Like, we go, like,
"Oh, he's got a dad bod."

1128
00:53:11,004 --> 00:53:15,434
We're like, "Okay." It's like we
all got together and conspired.

1129
00:53:15,436 --> 00:53:16,835
You know what I mean? Anyway.

1130
00:53:16,837 --> 00:53:18,102
Um...

1131
00:53:18,104 --> 00:53:21,671
So, yeah, so...
radiologist, surfer.

1132
00:53:23,004 --> 00:53:25,771
Nightmare if he was
a surfing radiologist.

1133
00:53:26,937 --> 00:53:29,570
Because that would be...
that would be...

1134
00:53:36,070 --> 00:53:39,434
It would, like... Like, what,
he's gonna pull up to my house

1135
00:53:39,436 --> 00:53:43,002
with his dumb,
beautiful Porsche.

1136
00:53:43,004 --> 00:53:46,704
Um, and take her out
on... on a date?

1137
00:53:48,837 --> 00:53:49,771
I mean...

1138
00:53:51,537 --> 00:53:53,738
Jill, this is where I got stuck.

1139
00:53:54,638 --> 00:53:56,035
Keep... Keep going?

1140
00:53:56,037 --> 00:53:57,470
Yeah, I don't... Okay.

1141
00:53:58,004 --> 00:53:59,569
This is the...

1142
00:53:59,571 --> 00:54:01,501
What did I write
on my thing after...?

1143
00:54:01,503 --> 00:54:02,669
You wrote...

1144
00:54:02,671 --> 00:54:04,868
What did I say
after I take them, uh...

1145
00:54:04,870 --> 00:54:05,835
I take them on a date?

1146
00:54:05,837 --> 00:54:07,002
It's right there on the thing.

1147
00:54:07,004 --> 00:54:08,835
It says "I have small penis."

1148
00:54:08,837 --> 00:54:10,702
It does not say
I have a small penis!

1149
00:54:10,704 --> 00:54:12,738
"I have a very small penis."

1150
00:54:14,503 --> 00:54:15,968
Oh, I follow them.

1151
00:54:15,970 --> 00:54:18,035
I follow them. I follow them.
Thank you very much.

1152
00:54:18,037 --> 00:54:19,102
- You're welcome.
- That's my friend Jill

1153
00:54:19,104 --> 00:54:20,968
who's very helpful, um...

1154
00:54:20,970 --> 00:54:22,736
By the way,
if I had a small penis,

1155
00:54:22,738 --> 00:54:24,669
I wouldn't need
to remind myself.

1156
00:54:24,671 --> 00:54:27,102
I feel like I would, um...

1157
00:54:27,104 --> 00:54:28,669
By the way, I don't.

1158
00:54:28,671 --> 00:54:29,771
Anyway.

1159
00:54:31,837 --> 00:54:33,470
I don't know. Uh...

1160
00:54:33,970 --> 00:54:35,004
And...

1161
00:54:35,604 --> 00:54:36,837
So, anyway...

1162
00:54:38,403 --> 00:54:40,468
I-I left you a little something.

1163
00:54:40,470 --> 00:54:43,501
Just to for you to remember
to have confidence.

1164
00:54:43,503 --> 00:54:46,035
The folder is unacceptable.
Bright yellow?

1165
00:54:46,037 --> 00:54:47,802
Why? This is where
I keep everything organized.

1166
00:54:47,804 --> 00:54:51,536
It's just, "I'm a dad
coming to..." We don't do that.

1167
00:54:51,538 --> 00:54:54,035
We have it in here, like adults.

1168
00:54:54,037 --> 00:54:56,602
I like the way that you
even wrote it in uppercase

1169
00:54:56,604 --> 00:54:58,102
just to make sure that
it looks like I wrote it.

1170
00:54:58,104 --> 00:54:59,602
- Like a dude wrote it.
- Yeah, yeah.

1171
00:54:59,604 --> 00:55:02,434
I embossed it.
I matched your handwriting.

1172
00:55:02,436 --> 00:55:04,870
It's untraceable. To me.

1173
00:55:06,604 --> 00:55:09,434
I think we should fuck.
I think we should fuck.

1174
00:55:09,436 --> 00:55:10,835
- You and me?
- Yeah.

1175
00:55:10,837 --> 00:55:12,702
Is that crazy?
I think we should fuck.

1176
00:55:12,704 --> 00:55:13,804
Is that crazy?

1177
00:55:14,037 --> 00:55:15,571
We're gonna fuck.

1178
00:55:45,436 --> 00:55:46,571
Are you a nurse?

1179
00:55:47,403 --> 00:55:48,935
No, I'm a comedian.

1180
00:55:48,937 --> 00:55:50,434
Are you a fucking nurse?

1181
00:55:50,436 --> 00:55:51,638
Don't let my cat out.

1182
00:56:10,937 --> 00:56:12,469
Jill?

1183
00:56:12,471 --> 00:56:14,771
<i>And don't answer my buzzer.</i>

1184
00:56:22,870 --> 00:56:25,502
I understand it now,
so I'm good.

1185
00:56:25,504 --> 00:56:26,802
Same.

1186
00:56:26,804 --> 00:56:27,669
No, you don't
understand it now, dude.

1187
00:56:27,671 --> 00:56:29,334
Yes, I do, anyways.

1188
00:56:29,336 --> 00:56:31,401
You guys gonna crush this
"Under Pressure" thing or what?

1189
00:56:31,403 --> 00:56:33,102
- Gonna crush it.
- You're screwing me up.

1190
00:56:33,104 --> 00:56:34,636
- Dad?
- Yeah?

1191
00:56:34,638 --> 00:56:36,870
- Are you sad?
- No. Why, do I look sad?

1192
00:56:40,970 --> 00:56:44,068
Hey! No, hey, hey.
What the fuck, guys?

1193
00:56:44,070 --> 00:56:45,504
Sorry.

1194
00:56:46,604 --> 00:56:49,402
Guys, where'd you find this?

1195
00:56:49,404 --> 00:56:50,402
- By your bed.
- By your bed.

1196
00:56:50,404 --> 00:56:51,902
Like where the stand is.

1197
00:56:51,904 --> 00:56:54,435
Okay. You're not supposed to
touch other people's stuff.

1198
00:56:54,437 --> 00:56:55,968
But it was like,
right on your side table.

1199
00:56:55,970 --> 00:56:58,002
- I know, I know, I know.
- It's right where I sleep.

1200
00:56:58,004 --> 00:56:59,402
I know, but when peop...

1201
00:56:59,404 --> 00:57:00,536
It was right next to
where we sleep.

1202
00:57:00,538 --> 00:57:01,935
I know,
but when people leave stuff...

1203
00:57:01,937 --> 00:57:03,802
When it's other people's
personal property

1204
00:57:03,804 --> 00:57:05,402
that's obviously their property,

1205
00:57:05,404 --> 00:57:06,835
you don't touch it, okay?

1206
00:57:06,837 --> 00:57:08,569
Like, that's just like
a rule in life.

1207
00:57:08,571 --> 00:57:09,935
Yeah, but it's weird.
Like, really weird.

1208
00:57:09,937 --> 00:57:11,771
Okay, I know. But it's just...

1209
00:57:12,437 --> 00:57:14,704
It's just a joke book, okay?

1210
00:57:15,704 --> 00:57:16,937
Jokes?

1211
00:57:17,471 --> 00:57:20,037
No, more like... just maybe...

1212
00:57:21,571 --> 00:57:22,935
jokes that
I've been thinking about.

1213
00:57:22,937 --> 00:57:24,802
You know, like, like made up...

1214
00:57:24,804 --> 00:57:26,402
- funny stories.
- They aren't funny, Dad.

1215
00:57:26,404 --> 00:57:28,968
You write about so much stuff,
like... radio-ologist.

1216
00:57:28,970 --> 00:57:30,371
And surfer.

1217
00:57:32,504 --> 00:57:36,070
- What's a radio-ologist?
- And talk about us and Mom.

1218
00:57:36,970 --> 00:57:39,435
I know, I know, but you guys...
you guys are real.

1219
00:57:39,437 --> 00:57:40,868
And me and your mom are real.

1220
00:57:40,870 --> 00:57:43,835
And the radiologist is made up.
He's a kind of doctor.

1221
00:57:43,837 --> 00:57:45,868
And the surfer...
The surfer's made up.

1222
00:57:45,870 --> 00:57:48,404
Those are just characters, okay?
And... and it's like, I'm...

1223
00:57:50,804 --> 00:57:54,068
It's like I'm making up stories,
you know,

1224
00:57:54,070 --> 00:57:56,569
because a lot of stuff
is changing.

1225
00:57:56,571 --> 00:57:59,435
Right? And it's... and it's
kind of a way to process it all.

1226
00:57:59,437 --> 00:58:01,035
- Do you know what I mean?
- Mm-hmm.

1227
00:58:01,037 --> 00:58:04,337
Oh, no. Come on.
Come on, come on. Hey, hey.

1228
00:58:05,437 --> 00:58:07,002
Hey, listen. Hey, hey.

1229
00:58:07,004 --> 00:58:08,702
No, listen, none of it's real.

1230
00:58:08,704 --> 00:58:10,669
That's all made-up stuff, okay?

1231
00:58:10,671 --> 00:58:12,669
Come on. Come on.
It's just made up.

1232
00:58:12,671 --> 00:58:15,837
None of it's real life,
really. Okay?

1233
00:58:16,371 --> 00:58:18,371
You know how sometimes
you use your imagination...

1234
00:58:19,371 --> 00:58:22,604
to make up stories, you know?
And games and stuff?

1235
00:58:23,437 --> 00:58:24,271
It's like that.

1236
00:58:25,804 --> 00:58:28,035
It's like the grown-up version
of that.

1237
00:58:28,037 --> 00:58:29,571
And I'm... I'm just...

1238
00:58:32,804 --> 00:58:34,738
I don't know what I'm doing.

1239
00:58:36,671 --> 00:58:37,902
But you can ask me anything

1240
00:58:37,904 --> 00:58:39,402
and I'll tell you
the truth, okay?

1241
00:58:39,404 --> 00:58:41,769
Okay, but it's weird, Dad.

1242
00:58:41,771 --> 00:58:43,870
I know. Life's weird.

1243
00:58:54,738 --> 00:58:56,868
- Hey, Kemp.
<i>- Hey. I got a set for you.</i>

1244
00:58:56,870 --> 00:58:58,037
O-Okay.

1245
00:58:58,471 --> 00:59:00,002
It's so weird.

1246
00:59:00,004 --> 00:59:02,604
- Like an open mic thing?
<i>- No, no, no, guest spot.</i>

1247
00:59:02,771 --> 00:59:04,068
- Really?
<i>- Yep.</i>

1248
00:59:04,070 --> 00:59:05,704
Wow. Okay.

1249
00:59:06,804 --> 00:59:09,068
- When? Is...
<i>- Tonight, 8:00.</i>

1250
00:59:09,070 --> 00:59:11,037
- Tonight, as in today, tonight?
<i>- Yeah.</i>

1251
00:59:12,538 --> 00:59:14,002
No, I don't know.
I don't know if I can...

1252
00:59:14,004 --> 00:59:16,371
I don't know if I
can really step... step away.

1253
00:59:17,004 --> 00:59:18,868
No, no. Wait. Sorry. Sorry.

1254
00:59:18,870 --> 00:59:20,369
No, no, no. Wait.
I'll do it. I'll do it.

1255
00:59:20,371 --> 00:59:20,937
Fuck it. I'll do it. I'll do it.

1256
00:59:22,837 --> 00:59:24,068
- Hey. Hey.
- Hey.

1257
00:59:24,070 --> 00:59:25,736
What's going on?
Is everything okay?

1258
00:59:25,738 --> 00:59:26,736
Yeah, everything's great.
Everything's great.

1259
00:59:26,738 --> 00:59:28,102
Everything's good.

1260
00:59:28,104 --> 00:59:29,636
- Are the boys okay?
- Yeah, the boys are great.

1261
00:59:29,638 --> 00:59:30,935
Hey, listen, do you mind

1262
00:59:30,937 --> 00:59:32,569
if I drop them off here
for a couple hours?

1263
00:59:32,571 --> 00:59:34,636
- I know it's last minute, but...
- What the fuck?

1264
00:59:34,638 --> 00:59:36,068
No, no, I...
Listen, Tess, please...

1265
00:59:36,070 --> 00:59:38,636
Listen, don't ambush me
like this in front of the boys

1266
00:59:38,638 --> 00:59:41,002
as though they can't come home
whenever they want.

1267
00:59:41,004 --> 00:59:44,035
Like I'm trying to keep them
from being inside?

1268
00:59:44,037 --> 00:59:46,070
Come on. That sucks.

1269
00:59:46,804 --> 00:59:48,538
- Look...
- You suck.

1270
00:59:49,904 --> 00:59:51,337
<i>You</i> suck!

1271
00:59:51,870 --> 00:59:53,636
- What the fuck?
- Hey, where are you going?

1272
00:59:53,638 --> 00:59:55,435
You know, I got it covered.

1273
00:59:55,437 --> 00:59:57,002
- No, where are you going?
- No, no, forget it. Forget it.

1274
00:59:57,004 --> 00:59:58,068
- Hey, Lucy! No!
- Yeah. Good.

1275
00:59:58,070 --> 00:59:59,536
Let's go, Charlie, let's go!

1276
00:59:59,538 --> 01:00:01,469
- No, Charlie, stay!
- No, I got 'em all.

1277
01:00:01,471 --> 01:00:02,602
- What?
- I got it covered.

1278
01:00:02,604 --> 01:00:03,802
You don't even have leashes.

1279
01:00:03,804 --> 01:00:05,968
No, it's okay.
I got my own leashes.

1280
01:00:05,970 --> 01:00:08,004
I got lots of leashes.

1281
01:00:10,538 --> 01:00:11,802
Okay.

1282
01:00:11,804 --> 01:00:13,771
- Hi, Grandma!
- Puppy dogs!

1283
01:00:14,804 --> 01:00:17,769
- Hi, darlin's.
- I'm sorry. Sorry about this.

1284
01:00:17,771 --> 01:00:19,068
I know it's last minute.
Come on.

1285
01:00:19,070 --> 01:00:21,669
Please. I'm so happy
that you thought of us.

1286
01:00:21,671 --> 01:00:23,736
Are you kidding?
Who else would we think of?

1287
01:00:23,738 --> 01:00:25,968
- Please do not feed the dogs.
- Hi, Grandpa.

1288
01:00:25,970 --> 01:00:27,402
Okay.

1289
01:00:27,404 --> 01:00:29,736
- Hey, Dad. Hi. Hey.
- Hey, son. Hi.

1290
01:00:29,738 --> 01:00:31,068
No, no, no.

1291
01:00:31,070 --> 01:00:32,736
- I can't stay for dinner.
- What?

1292
01:00:32,738 --> 01:00:34,736
- I gotta go back to the city.
- Well, yes, you can.

1293
01:00:34,738 --> 01:00:38,335
It's not good to run around
on an empty stomach.

1294
01:00:38,337 --> 01:00:40,835
Read between the lines, Marilyn.
He's got a hot date.

1295
01:00:40,837 --> 01:00:42,602
- Dad, don't...
- Hot date?

1296
01:00:42,604 --> 01:00:44,636
- You can stay for a quick bite.
- Dad has a hot date?

1297
01:00:44,638 --> 01:00:46,035
No, I can't stay
for a quick bite.

1298
01:00:46,037 --> 01:00:47,835
- I gotta get back to the city.
- Do you have any Jell-O?

1299
01:00:47,837 --> 01:00:50,068
I told you...
No, no, no. I have to go...

1300
01:00:50,070 --> 01:00:51,968
If you must know,
I gotta get changed

1301
01:00:51,970 --> 01:00:53,536
and I'm going to a comedy club.

1302
01:00:53,538 --> 01:00:55,469
What? Well, you can go later.

1303
01:00:55,471 --> 01:00:56,935
You know, you want to go later,

1304
01:00:56,937 --> 01:00:58,669
because they usually
put the guys

1305
01:00:58,671 --> 01:01:00,035
who ain't so funny
at the beginning,

1306
01:01:00,037 --> 01:01:01,968
and then... so the pros
look better later on.

1307
01:01:01,970 --> 01:01:04,738
No, I can't...
I can't be late because I'm...

1308
01:01:05,337 --> 01:01:07,304
- I'm one of the guys going up.
- What?

1309
01:01:08,437 --> 01:01:09,902
I've been doing open mic nights.

1310
01:01:09,904 --> 01:01:11,935
- What's an open mic?
- I just... And, they...

1311
01:01:11,937 --> 01:01:13,068
I just got a call that
one of the comics

1312
01:01:13,070 --> 01:01:14,802
who's emceeing
at the club tonight,

1313
01:01:14,804 --> 01:01:16,935
they agreed to give me
ten minutes on stage.

1314
01:01:16,937 --> 01:01:18,402
I'm one of the acts.
One of the comedy acts.

1315
01:01:18,404 --> 01:01:19,968
- You?
- Yeah, me.

1316
01:01:19,970 --> 01:01:24,037
Well... so, I don't know...
What do you do, you tell jokes?

1317
01:01:24,771 --> 01:01:26,835
I mean, sort of.
Well, kind of...

1318
01:01:26,837 --> 01:01:28,636
more like funny stories
about my life.

1319
01:01:28,638 --> 01:01:30,068
- Oh, honey.
- What's funny about your life?

1320
01:01:30,070 --> 01:01:31,769
I had no idea
your life was so bad.

1321
01:01:31,771 --> 01:01:33,569
No, no, no, it's not so bad.

1322
01:01:33,571 --> 01:01:35,769
- This is why she threw you out!
- What's funny about your life?

1323
01:01:35,771 --> 01:01:38,002
- She threw you out?
- Nobody threw me out, guys.

1324
01:01:38,004 --> 01:01:40,469
No, I love her.
Mom, what are you doing?

1325
01:01:40,471 --> 01:01:42,035
Nobody threw me out.
Nobody threw me out.

1326
01:01:42,037 --> 01:01:43,103
- I left by mutual consent.
- She threw you out?

1327
01:01:43,105 --> 01:01:45,902
No. Everybody knows that.
I left by mutual consent.

1328
01:01:45,904 --> 01:01:48,736
And, by the way, I'm not
in a bad place. I'm happy.

1329
01:01:48,738 --> 01:01:51,437
And doing this,
it makes me feel good.

1330
01:01:51,837 --> 01:01:55,335
- You know? It helps.
- How? How does it help

1331
01:01:55,337 --> 01:01:58,002
to have a roomful of people
laughing at you?

1332
01:01:58,004 --> 01:01:59,636
- They're not laughing at me.
- Son. Son.

1333
01:01:59,638 --> 01:02:01,369
And it's not bad
to have them laugh.

1334
01:02:01,371 --> 01:02:03,769
Son, you know what this is?
This is a mid-life crisis.

1335
01:02:03,771 --> 01:02:05,335
- That's what it is.
- Oh, Dad...

1336
01:02:05,337 --> 01:02:07,868
So, why you... Just go
get yourself a motorcycle.

1337
01:02:07,870 --> 01:02:09,502
I don't know. A leather jacket.

1338
01:02:09,504 --> 01:02:10,669
No. Dad, listen.
I love you very much.

1339
01:02:10,671 --> 01:02:12,335
- I love you all. Love you guys.
- Come on.

1340
01:02:12,337 --> 01:02:13,902
I will see you in the morning.
Thank you so much.

1341
01:02:13,904 --> 01:02:15,835
Remember to pick us up
on your new motorcycle!

1342
01:02:15,837 --> 01:02:17,536
Nobody's getting a motorcycle.

1343
01:02:17,538 --> 01:02:20,638
No, it is definitely not a date.

1344
01:02:21,037 --> 01:02:24,835
Because he has a wife,
and he's had children.

1345
01:02:24,837 --> 01:02:26,704
They've been together for ages.

1346
01:02:27,404 --> 01:02:29,571
Yes, yes. Always just friends.

1347
01:02:30,071 --> 01:02:31,569
He called because he heard that

1348
01:02:31,571 --> 01:02:33,304
I was putting out feelers
about coaching.

1349
01:02:50,571 --> 01:02:51,571
Okay.

1350
01:02:58,071 --> 01:03:00,502
- Hey. I'm meeting...
- Hi, welcome.

1351
01:03:00,504 --> 01:03:02,504
I see him right there.
Thank you.

1352
01:03:07,371 --> 01:03:09,404
Excuse me. Hey.

1353
01:03:10,038 --> 01:03:11,402
How you doing?

1354
01:03:11,404 --> 01:03:12,702
"We're gonna need that hand,
Roche!"

1355
01:03:12,704 --> 01:03:15,602
Stop.

1356
01:03:15,604 --> 01:03:18,335
I used to slam the floor
so fucking hard

1357
01:03:18,337 --> 01:03:20,103
and pretend it didn't hurt.

1358
01:03:20,105 --> 01:03:22,335
Look, that's what made you
a champion.

1359
01:03:22,337 --> 01:03:24,638
Your singular focus,
your dedication.

1360
01:03:25,704 --> 01:03:28,502
That's why I heard
you wanted to get into coaching,

1361
01:03:28,504 --> 01:03:29,736
I had to reach out.

1362
01:03:29,738 --> 01:03:31,435
It's very flattering.

1363
01:03:31,437 --> 01:03:33,003
I was really excited
you reached out.

1364
01:03:33,005 --> 01:03:35,402
Half the US Women's
volleyball team

1365
01:03:35,404 --> 01:03:37,702
has come out of our program.

1366
01:03:37,704 --> 01:03:39,802
And the truth is,
I've been missing it

1367
01:03:39,804 --> 01:03:41,837
every single day
since I retired.

1368
01:03:42,471 --> 01:03:44,003
I just...

1369
01:03:44,005 --> 01:03:46,904
Yeah, I knew coaching
would be a great way back in.

1370
01:03:47,337 --> 01:03:49,069
I guess part of me
didn't want to accept

1371
01:03:49,071 --> 01:03:50,837
that I wasn't a player anymore.

1372
01:03:51,337 --> 01:03:53,802
You know, so much of my identity
was wrapped up in it and...

1373
01:03:53,804 --> 01:03:55,935
I get that. But I'm telling you,

1374
01:03:55,937 --> 01:03:58,602
coaching fills that void
for you.

1375
01:03:58,604 --> 01:04:00,435
It forces you to shift gears.

1376
01:04:00,437 --> 01:04:02,902
You stop using the phrase,
"Hey, back when I played..."

1377
01:04:02,904 --> 01:04:04,036
Right.

1378
01:04:04,038 --> 01:04:06,837
You learn
to make everyone better

1379
01:04:07,404 --> 01:04:09,736
without comparing them
to yourself.

1380
01:04:09,738 --> 01:04:11,736
Right. Amazing.

1381
01:04:11,738 --> 01:04:13,602
Is... Is it frustrating?

1382
01:04:13,604 --> 01:04:16,602
- Yes! Absolutely frustrating.
- Oh. Okay.

1383
01:04:16,604 --> 01:04:17,802
That's just a given.

1384
01:04:17,804 --> 01:04:19,602
I think it'll always
be that way.

1385
01:04:19,604 --> 01:04:22,769
But for me, I can't tell you
how gratifying it is

1386
01:04:22,771 --> 01:04:26,971
to be part of a sport as
it evolves, despite not playing.

1387
01:04:27,638 --> 01:04:29,502
- Wow.
- That's what does it for me.

1388
01:04:29,504 --> 01:04:32,402
The best part, my three
daughters, they love it.

1389
01:04:32,404 --> 01:04:34,669
They actually
think their dad is cool.

1390
01:04:34,671 --> 01:04:37,602
Hey, how's Tracy?
What a beast she was.

1391
01:04:37,604 --> 01:04:38,769
She's good.

1392
01:04:38,771 --> 01:04:41,103
She's, uh, in Salt Lake,
doing her thing.

1393
01:04:41,105 --> 01:04:42,868
Oh, yeah. Is she skiing or...?

1394
01:04:42,870 --> 01:04:43,804
Polygamy.

1395
01:04:46,571 --> 01:04:48,335
Oh!

1396
01:04:48,337 --> 01:04:50,036
Yeah, look. It threw us
for a loop. Don't get me wrong.

1397
01:04:50,038 --> 01:04:52,604
But... it's all worked out.

1398
01:04:52,804 --> 01:04:55,804
- I-I didn't know you'd split.
- Seven years now.

1399
01:04:56,504 --> 01:04:58,402
I have to admit, being single

1400
01:04:58,404 --> 01:05:00,304
in your mid-to-late-forties
is, uh...

1401
01:05:01,038 --> 01:05:03,005
What's the word here?
Interesting?

1402
01:05:04,071 --> 01:05:05,835
- Okay?
- Is that the word?

1403
01:05:05,837 --> 01:05:06,804
But...

1404
01:05:08,504 --> 01:05:10,702
I'd be lost without coaching.

1405
01:05:10,704 --> 01:05:12,005
It... It saved me.

1406
01:05:13,371 --> 01:05:15,036
So... All right.
Enough about me.

1407
01:05:15,038 --> 01:05:16,669
Alex. How's he doing?

1408
01:05:16,671 --> 01:05:18,569
- Two boys, right?
- Two boys.

1409
01:05:18,571 --> 01:05:20,504
- How are they?
- They are great.

1410
01:05:20,870 --> 01:05:23,335
Well, adjusting, 'cause, uh,

1411
01:05:23,337 --> 01:05:24,969
Alex and I decided
to take a little break.

1412
01:05:24,971 --> 01:05:26,471
Oh, no.

1413
01:05:27,105 --> 01:05:28,837
I'm sorry. I hadn't heard that.

1414
01:05:29,105 --> 01:05:30,837
Yeah. No, it's...

1415
01:05:31,870 --> 01:05:33,804
Wait, it's not a break.

1416
01:05:34,738 --> 01:05:36,671
We split. He moved out.

1417
01:05:38,071 --> 01:05:39,969
- Wow.
- Uh, it's over. Yeah.

1418
01:05:39,971 --> 01:05:41,571
Wow. Okay.

1419
01:05:42,038 --> 01:05:43,304
Yeah, it's actually good.

1420
01:05:44,538 --> 01:05:46,602
I gotta admit, I'm shocked.

1421
01:05:46,604 --> 01:05:48,804
You two just seemed like
a perfect fit to me.

1422
01:05:50,105 --> 01:05:53,471
Yeah. Me too, but, um...

1423
01:05:56,871 --> 01:05:58,071
I guess we just...

1424
01:06:00,604 --> 01:06:02,569
slowly grew away
from each other.

1425
01:06:02,571 --> 01:06:03,704
If that makes any sense.

1426
01:06:04,404 --> 01:06:05,371
I get that.

1427
01:06:06,504 --> 01:06:07,704
Jeez, Tess, I'm...

1428
01:06:09,038 --> 01:06:10,571
I'm glad I reached out.

1429
01:06:16,071 --> 01:06:17,335
Yeah.

1430
01:06:17,337 --> 01:06:19,738
Are you tired? 'Cause I'm not.

1431
01:06:20,437 --> 01:06:22,003
I'm not tired. Absolutely not.

1432
01:06:22,005 --> 01:06:23,369
My buddy says
there's a great place

1433
01:06:23,371 --> 01:06:24,769
right around the corner,
actually.

1434
01:06:24,771 --> 01:06:28,103
Oh. Amazing. I'm gonna just...

1435
01:06:28,105 --> 01:06:29,471
- Yeah. Okay.
- Use the restroom and...

1436
01:06:30,005 --> 01:06:30,938
Be right back.

1437
01:06:46,538 --> 01:06:47,371
Yeah.

1438
01:06:48,105 --> 01:06:49,805
Fuck it.

1439
01:06:51,971 --> 01:06:53,471
- All right. Following you.
- Okay.

1440
01:06:54,971 --> 01:06:56,536
Sounds fun.

1441
01:06:56,538 --> 01:06:58,469
No, I'm not gonna do it, but...

1442
01:06:58,471 --> 01:06:59,738
Absolutely not.

1443
01:07:04,805 --> 01:07:06,369
- They letting you go up tonight?
- Yeah.

1444
01:07:06,371 --> 01:07:07,671
We'll see.
I'm a little bit late.

1445
01:07:08,838 --> 01:07:10,369
- Fuck. Cutting it close.
- Sorry.

1446
01:07:10,371 --> 01:07:12,105
I got held up. I'm sorry.

1447
01:07:13,805 --> 01:07:15,003
I was starting to think
you were bailing on me.

1448
01:07:15,005 --> 01:07:16,569
What? No, no, no. No.

1449
01:07:16,571 --> 01:07:17,770
- Whatever, I just...
- You want a drink?

1450
01:07:17,772 --> 01:07:19,003
- No, no, no. I'm good.
- Okay.

1451
01:07:19,005 --> 01:07:20,838
Oh, my God, I need a beer.

1452
01:07:22,971 --> 01:07:24,469
Big night.

1453
01:07:24,471 --> 01:07:25,969
- Big night tonight.
- Oh, my God.

1454
01:07:25,971 --> 01:07:28,103
- You're gonna kill it.
- I know, I know.

1455
01:07:28,105 --> 01:07:29,938
Then we'll see.
I'll meet you up here.

1456
01:07:30,704 --> 01:07:32,105
I'll meet you back here
when we're done.

1457
01:07:42,738 --> 01:07:44,736
Uh, Sam Jay has the light.
You have two minutes.

1458
01:07:44,738 --> 01:07:45,805
Okay.

1459
01:07:47,371 --> 01:07:48,671
You're gonna be great.

1460
01:08:03,905 --> 01:08:06,571
We can't just fuck and
make a kid. We can't do that.

1461
01:08:06,838 --> 01:08:08,369
So it's like,
how we gonna do it?

1462
01:08:08,371 --> 01:08:10,337
Someone's gotta go buy nut
and I'm not buying nut.

1463
01:08:11,704 --> 01:08:12,936
I'm not.
I'm not goin' to the nut store,

1464
01:08:12,938 --> 01:08:14,103
ask nobody for no nut.

1465
01:08:14,105 --> 01:08:15,669
And she got upset
when I told her that.

1466
01:08:15,671 --> 01:08:17,469
She's, like, "You're an asshole.

1467
01:08:17,471 --> 01:08:19,737
We don't just have to buy a nut.
We can just adopt."

1468
01:08:19,739 --> 01:08:21,335
I'm like, "All right." Now
we're going to the baby store

1469
01:08:21,337 --> 01:08:23,569
and buying a whole one, so...

1470
01:08:23,571 --> 01:08:25,638
Hey, my name's been Sam Jay.
Thank you so much.

1471
01:08:29,038 --> 01:08:30,871
Yeah!

1472
01:08:32,371 --> 01:08:33,770
You guys,
give it up for Sam Jay!

1473
01:08:33,772 --> 01:08:35,437
I hope there's somebody else.

1474
01:08:35,805 --> 01:08:37,871
- She was great.
- She was great.

1475
01:08:39,038 --> 01:08:40,569
- This is so fun.
- It's cool, right?

1476
01:08:40,571 --> 01:08:41,936
Love it.

1477
01:08:41,938 --> 01:08:42,469
Next comedian
coming to the stage...

1478
01:08:42,471 --> 01:08:43,803
I'm glad we're here.

1479
01:08:43,805 --> 01:08:45,335
First time on this show.

1480
01:08:45,337 --> 01:08:47,469
Yeah, so I need you guys
to give him a lot of energy.

1481
01:08:47,471 --> 01:08:49,003
Start clapping,
make a lot of noise...

1482
01:08:49,005 --> 01:08:50,435
All right.
Somebody else coming.

1483
01:08:50,437 --> 01:08:52,905
And give it up for Alex Novak!

1484
01:08:56,504 --> 01:08:57,739
How you doing?

1485
01:08:59,871 --> 01:09:02,670
Oh! How you guys doing tonight?

1486
01:09:02,672 --> 01:09:04,703
Yeah! Give it up for our host.

1487
01:09:04,705 --> 01:09:06,304
- Wait.
- He's doing great, huh?

1488
01:09:06,638 --> 01:09:08,670
What the fuck is happening?

1489
01:09:08,672 --> 01:09:09,936
Give it up for me.
I'm doing great!

1490
01:09:09,938 --> 01:09:11,869
I can promise you,
I did not know...

1491
01:09:11,871 --> 01:09:13,069
I don't...

1492
01:09:13,071 --> 01:09:13,903
My personal life's
in the shitter...

1493
01:09:13,905 --> 01:09:15,471
- Does he do...?
- No!

1494
01:09:15,805 --> 01:09:18,069
Yeah, I mean, I'm paying rent
on a shitty apartment

1495
01:09:18,071 --> 01:09:20,969
and mortgage on a house
I don't live in anymore.

1496
01:09:20,971 --> 01:09:23,469
You know? It's fine.
And one of my teeth hurts.

1497
01:09:23,471 --> 01:09:25,836
And I don't even know
where my dentist is.

1498
01:09:25,838 --> 01:09:27,803
My ex used to handle all that.

1499
01:09:27,805 --> 01:09:30,404
But other than that,
you know... Hey...

1500
01:09:31,337 --> 01:09:33,335
I had sex with a woman.

1501
01:09:33,337 --> 01:09:35,639
Yeah, so like I said,
I'm doing great.

1502
01:09:37,504 --> 01:09:38,739
Yeah.

1503
01:09:40,471 --> 01:09:43,538
I never thought I'd get applause
for having sex with a woman.

1504
01:09:44,005 --> 01:09:46,602
Like, "You finally did it!"

1505
01:09:46,604 --> 01:09:47,838
Yeah!

1506
01:09:49,005 --> 01:09:52,672
Uh, yeah. No, I had sex
with a... with a woman, um...

1507
01:09:53,404 --> 01:09:55,836
after, you know, being married
for a number of years.

1508
01:09:55,838 --> 01:09:57,772
And... and it was...

1509
01:09:58,772 --> 01:10:00,069
scary.

1510
01:10:00,071 --> 01:10:01,536
Yeah.

1511
01:10:01,538 --> 01:10:03,971
But at least
I was not very good at it.

1512
01:10:06,005 --> 01:10:09,903
I think that after... I think
after 20 years of marriage,

1513
01:10:09,905 --> 01:10:13,536
you know, you just get used to
doing things a certain way.

1514
01:10:13,538 --> 01:10:15,536
You know what I mean?
Like, sex with your wi...

1515
01:10:15,538 --> 01:10:17,469
It's... It's fine.
It was great with my...

1516
01:10:17,471 --> 01:10:19,903
It's like, you know
when you go to an Airbnb,

1517
01:10:19,905 --> 01:10:23,536
and you go into the kitchen, and
it kind of looks the same, like,

1518
01:10:23,538 --> 01:10:25,569
but it's just
a little bit different?

1519
01:10:25,571 --> 01:10:28,435
Like, certain spoons
are in different drawers?

1520
01:10:28,437 --> 01:10:29,903
So you're kind of
looking around,

1521
01:10:29,905 --> 01:10:31,637
you're opening stuff up,
and you're like...

1522
01:10:31,639 --> 01:10:33,605
And I was doing that
on a human body.

1523
01:10:35,005 --> 01:10:37,903
I don't know, I feel like
sex now has really changed

1524
01:10:37,905 --> 01:10:42,036
since back when
I was out there in the game 20...

1525
01:10:42,038 --> 01:10:44,069
I never cheated on my wife,
so this is the first...

1526
01:10:44,071 --> 01:10:45,803
And it feels like now...

1527
01:10:45,805 --> 01:10:46,903
Are you sure
you don't want to leave?

1528
01:10:46,905 --> 01:10:47,903
There are so many noises

1529
01:10:47,905 --> 01:10:49,502
- that she was making.
- No.

1530
01:10:49,504 --> 01:10:50,502
- So animalistic.
- I don't want to go anywhere.

1531
01:10:50,504 --> 01:10:52,536
And it just felt like
two apes fucking.

1532
01:10:52,538 --> 01:10:54,670
Obviously,
apes do not make love, right?

1533
01:10:54,672 --> 01:10:56,803
Nobody imagines
that apes are like this,

1534
01:10:56,805 --> 01:10:58,603
staring in
each other's eyes, saying,

1535
01:10:58,605 --> 01:11:01,737
"I love you. And
let's come at the same time."

1536
01:11:01,739 --> 01:11:03,637
Apes don't do that shit.

1537
01:11:03,639 --> 01:11:06,803
Apes are doing it, fucking,
you know, dog-style.

1538
01:11:06,805 --> 01:11:09,402
Or ape-style.
Whatever the fuck it is.

1539
01:11:09,404 --> 01:11:11,936
I don't know.

1540
01:11:11,938 --> 01:11:13,803
I gotta tell you,
the whole experience,

1541
01:11:13,805 --> 01:11:15,703
to be honest,
made me miss my wife.

1542
01:11:15,705 --> 01:11:17,471
It really did. Yeah.

1543
01:11:17,871 --> 01:11:21,572
Which was, um,
surprising because...

1544
01:11:22,471 --> 01:11:23,737
we had a lot of fights.

1545
01:11:23,739 --> 01:11:26,304
Listen... And, um...

1546
01:11:26,772 --> 01:11:29,772
And I actually kind of ended up
missing some of our fights, too.

1547
01:11:30,572 --> 01:11:32,871
Yeah, they were...
Our fights were...

1548
01:11:33,071 --> 01:11:34,337
Uh...

1549
01:11:34,805 --> 01:11:36,836
psychological?

1550
01:11:36,838 --> 01:11:38,539
Do you know what I mean?
Do you know what I mean by that?

1551
01:11:39,838 --> 01:11:42,537
All the dudes know what I mean.

1552
01:11:42,539 --> 01:11:44,369
They're like,
"Yeah. Every interaction

1553
01:11:44,371 --> 01:11:46,772
is a fucking
psychological minefield."

1554
01:11:47,605 --> 01:11:49,469
You know when your wife
or your partner

1555
01:11:49,471 --> 01:11:51,335
gets really, really quiet,

1556
01:11:51,337 --> 01:11:53,838
and now you gotta
guess what's wrong?

1557
01:11:54,105 --> 01:11:58,069
So, you have to ask
a blanket, like, question.

1558
01:11:58,071 --> 01:11:59,703
Keep it really gener...

1559
01:11:59,705 --> 01:12:02,903
I remember one time,
my ex-wife and I were driving,

1560
01:12:02,905 --> 01:12:04,437
coming home
from a friend's place.

1561
01:12:05,404 --> 01:12:07,805
And she is so quiet.

1562
01:12:08,805 --> 01:12:10,637
She's so quiet, like...

1563
01:12:10,639 --> 01:12:12,371
Do you remember <i>Jacob's Ladder?</i>

1564
01:12:13,472 --> 01:12:15,103
It was like that. Right?

1565
01:12:15,105 --> 01:12:17,703
I'm sort of dating myself
a little bit, but it was...

1566
01:12:17,705 --> 01:12:20,770
It was like I was questioning
my own existence on the planet,

1567
01:12:20,772 --> 01:12:21,903
it was so quiet.

1568
01:12:21,905 --> 01:12:24,369
Just the two of us, in the car,

1569
01:12:24,371 --> 01:12:27,938
and I'm so scared
of what she's gonna say.

1570
01:12:28,639 --> 01:12:30,603
So I just go...

1571
01:12:30,605 --> 01:12:31,905
I muster up the courage.

1572
01:12:34,071 --> 01:12:35,639
"Honey, are you mad at me?"

1573
01:12:37,971 --> 01:12:39,603
And she looks at me
and she goes,

1574
01:12:39,605 --> 01:12:43,869
"You know, sometimes I just
wish that you'd talk to me

1575
01:12:43,871 --> 01:12:45,971
the same way that you talk
to your friends."

1576
01:12:47,705 --> 01:12:49,005
And I go, "Okay."

1577
01:12:52,539 --> 01:12:54,539
"Dude,
my wife is driving me crazy."

1578
01:12:57,639 --> 01:12:59,103
Awesome.
You guys have been so great.

1579
01:12:59,105 --> 01:13:01,436
Thanks so much.
I've been Alex Novak.

1580
01:13:01,438 --> 01:13:02,803
All right, guys, thanks so much.
Good night.

1581
01:13:02,805 --> 01:13:04,038
Let's go.

1582
01:13:07,772 --> 01:13:10,603
You guys,
give it up for Alex Novak!

1583
01:13:10,605 --> 01:13:13,003
Oh, my God!
Alex, that was fantastic!

1584
01:13:13,005 --> 01:13:14,803
Yes! You were so good!

1585
01:13:14,805 --> 01:13:16,069
Hey, can I get some water,
please?

1586
01:13:16,071 --> 01:13:17,703
Absolutely, man. Yeah.

1587
01:13:17,705 --> 01:13:19,537
- Yeah.
- This is Laird. Sorry.

1588
01:13:19,539 --> 01:13:21,335
I'm Nina. Nice to meet you.
Good to see you.

1589
01:13:21,337 --> 01:13:22,737
Good to... Yeah, we're gonna...

1590
01:13:22,739 --> 01:13:24,605
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
No, I get it.

1591
01:13:24,938 --> 01:13:26,537
- It's a lot.
- All right.

1592
01:13:26,539 --> 01:13:27,703
You guys ready for this
next comedian? Say, "Hell yeah."

1593
01:13:27,705 --> 01:13:29,637
Hell yeah!

1594
01:13:29,639 --> 01:13:31,003
Start clapping right now.

1595
01:13:31,005 --> 01:13:36,005
Give it up right now
for the legend, Mr. Dave Attell!

1596
01:13:38,905 --> 01:13:40,869
Wow! What a night!

1597
01:13:40,871 --> 01:13:42,969
- Hey! How was it?
- It was so good.

1598
01:13:42,971 --> 01:13:44,603
- Was it good?
- I'm so proud of you.

1599
01:13:44,605 --> 01:13:46,369
- I just opened for Dave Attell!
- You ballsy motherfucker.

1600
01:13:46,371 --> 01:13:48,403
Yeah, you just did that set
in front of your wife.

1601
01:13:48,405 --> 01:13:49,936
- I respect that.
- What are you mean?

1602
01:13:49,938 --> 01:13:51,436
Tess is here with Laird.
The tall...

1603
01:13:51,438 --> 01:13:52,836
What do you mean, Tess?
Tess is here now?

1604
01:13:52,838 --> 01:13:53,969
What are you talking about?
Where?

1605
01:13:53,971 --> 01:13:54,537
Yeah, just saw them.
They went outside.

1606
01:13:54,539 --> 01:13:55,836
Did you not invite them?

1607
01:13:55,838 --> 01:13:56,637
No, I didn't
fucking invite them!

1608
01:13:56,639 --> 01:13:57,938
Jesus Christ.

1609
01:14:01,337 --> 01:14:03,836
- Holy shit. Okay.
- 'Cause I said so.

1610
01:14:03,838 --> 01:14:06,537
- Take it easy there, bruh.
- Whoa!

1611
01:14:06,539 --> 01:14:08,438
- What?
- You found a sitter?

1612
01:14:08,639 --> 01:14:10,637
No, I got them working
at the falafel place right here.

1613
01:14:10,639 --> 01:14:11,836
They're at your folks' place?

1614
01:14:11,838 --> 01:14:12,705
Yeah.

1615
01:14:13,971 --> 01:14:16,335
- What the fuck are you...?
- What the fuck?

1616
01:14:16,337 --> 01:14:17,803
What the fuck, me?
What the fuck are...?

1617
01:14:17,805 --> 01:14:19,470
You've been moving on, huh?

1618
01:14:19,472 --> 01:14:21,770
Me, moving on?
You show up with fucking Laird?

1619
01:14:21,772 --> 01:14:23,069
Who I just said goodbye to.

1620
01:14:23,071 --> 01:14:24,036
Okay, but Laird,
of all fucking people.

1621
01:14:24,038 --> 01:14:25,069
What the fuck do you care?

1622
01:14:25,071 --> 01:14:25,869
How long have you
been fucking him?

1623
01:14:25,871 --> 01:14:26,836
For years.

1624
01:14:26,838 --> 01:14:27,938
- No.
- No.

1625
01:14:28,338 --> 01:14:29,838
Oh, fuck.

1626
01:14:30,505 --> 01:14:32,069
How long you been doing...

1627
01:14:32,071 --> 01:14:33,670
- stand-up comedy?
- No, I only did that one time.

1628
01:14:33,672 --> 01:14:35,505
- Jesus Christ.
- Oh.

1629
01:14:35,838 --> 01:14:37,304
Mmm.

1630
01:14:40,338 --> 01:14:41,338
Sorry, I thought you...

1631
01:14:42,705 --> 01:14:44,405
Yeah, stand-up
I've been doing for a while.

1632
01:14:46,871 --> 01:14:48,637
So I'm the only one
who doesn't know you do this?

1633
01:14:48,639 --> 01:14:50,071
Actually, tonight
was kind of a big night.

1634
01:14:51,739 --> 01:14:54,572
I mean, it's obviously
bigger now that...

1635
01:14:56,372 --> 01:14:58,069
I usually only do
open mic nights,

1636
01:14:58,071 --> 01:14:59,472
and they're, like,
half the crowd, and...

1637
01:15:00,705 --> 01:15:01,869
I don't know
why I never told you.

1638
01:15:01,871 --> 01:15:03,470
I haven't even really
told myself

1639
01:15:03,472 --> 01:15:04,639
that it's becoming a thing,
you know?

1640
01:15:07,472 --> 01:15:08,605
It's hot.

1641
01:15:10,005 --> 01:15:10,905
Really?

1642
01:15:13,438 --> 01:15:14,672
Give me a drag.

1643
01:15:27,871 --> 01:15:29,472
Mmm.

1644
01:15:32,772 --> 01:15:34,537
Hey, will you pass me my smokes?

1645
01:15:34,539 --> 01:15:35,438
I think they're
on the table there.

1646
01:15:37,005 --> 01:15:38,936
If you hit the light.
The button's right on the...

1647
01:15:38,938 --> 01:15:40,338
You got it.

1648
01:15:40,871 --> 01:15:42,370
I think the lighter's there
too, right?

1649
01:15:42,372 --> 01:15:43,305
Yeah.

1650
01:15:43,472 --> 01:15:44,372
Thanks.

1651
01:15:51,838 --> 01:15:53,539
What's with all the smoking?

1652
01:15:54,871 --> 01:15:56,936
I feel like we're
in our twenties again.

1653
01:15:56,938 --> 01:15:58,838
Mmm.

1654
01:16:00,405 --> 01:16:01,539
Mmm.

1655
01:16:05,572 --> 01:16:07,470
I'm just, you know...

1656
01:16:07,472 --> 01:16:09,703
allowing myself the grace to...

1657
01:16:09,705 --> 01:16:11,971
- Marilyn?
- Yeah.

1658
01:16:14,539 --> 01:16:16,572
Let's talk about Marilyn.

1659
01:16:17,739 --> 01:16:19,305
Sorry.

1660
01:16:22,572 --> 01:16:26,539
What the absolute fuck?

1661
01:16:27,639 --> 01:16:29,503
Oh, my God.

1662
01:16:29,505 --> 01:16:31,805
Look, I think we're just gracing
the shit out of each other.

1663
01:16:32,372 --> 01:16:34,071
Sorry, sorry, sorry, sorry...

1664
01:16:34,838 --> 01:16:36,403
Sorry.

1665
01:16:36,405 --> 01:16:38,772
I promise
I won't bring my mom up again.

1666
01:16:40,505 --> 01:16:42,871
No, it's hot. No.

1667
01:16:46,539 --> 01:16:47,472
Oh.

1668
01:16:48,572 --> 01:16:49,739
Hey.

1669
01:16:53,605 --> 01:16:55,470
What about the boys?

1670
01:16:55,472 --> 01:16:57,038
Like, we can't tell anybody.

1671
01:16:58,838 --> 01:17:00,672
- No. No, of course.
- Right?

1672
01:17:01,038 --> 01:17:02,672
We can't confuse them.

1673
01:17:03,605 --> 01:17:06,639
'Cause, I mean, yeah.
This is confusing.

1674
01:17:07,672 --> 01:17:08,936
Yeah. No.

1675
01:17:08,938 --> 01:17:10,938
Of course. Yeah, it is.
It is confusing.

1676
01:17:14,038 --> 01:17:15,438
I'm sleeping over.

1677
01:17:16,639 --> 01:17:18,372
- Okay. Yeah.
- Yeah.

1678
01:17:18,838 --> 01:17:20,969
Uh, there's, like, boxers
and T-shirts

1679
01:17:20,971 --> 01:17:22,436
in that top drawer there.

1680
01:17:22,438 --> 01:17:23,605
- Here?
- Yeah.

1681
01:17:24,605 --> 01:17:26,372
I feel shaky.

1682
01:17:27,905 --> 01:17:28,905
Fuck.

1683
01:17:39,405 --> 01:17:41,505
I can't believe
you fucked somebody!

1684
01:17:51,805 --> 01:17:53,971
Oh, my God.

1685
01:17:56,438 --> 01:17:59,737
Did you fuck her right here?
In front of our armoire?

1686
01:17:59,739 --> 01:18:02,871
Come on. I never would have
done it in front of our armoire.

1687
01:18:03,705 --> 01:18:05,903
Do... Do you know how
sick and twisted that'd be

1688
01:18:05,905 --> 01:18:07,838
if I did it
in front of the armoire?

1689
01:18:15,438 --> 01:18:17,036
That was fucking insane.

1690
01:18:17,038 --> 01:18:18,672
That was fucking insane.

1691
01:18:19,805 --> 01:18:20,805
Mmm.

1692
01:18:23,338 --> 01:18:24,705
You kept looking at me.

1693
01:18:26,971 --> 01:18:28,405
I always do.

1694
01:18:29,971 --> 01:18:32,038
Have you upped your parenting
since we split?

1695
01:18:32,905 --> 01:18:34,639
Out of necessity.

1696
01:18:34,938 --> 01:18:37,038
Well, yeah, that.
But, I mean, like...

1697
01:18:38,405 --> 01:18:39,705
Do you find that you'll, like...

1698
01:18:41,338 --> 01:18:42,672
Do you find that you'll, like...

1699
01:18:44,372 --> 01:18:45,672
I don't know. You'll... You'll...

1700
01:18:46,372 --> 01:18:48,936
get off your phone
if the boys are around,

1701
01:18:48,938 --> 01:18:53,572
thinking that maybe they'll
see you on it less than me?

1702
01:18:54,672 --> 01:18:56,503
Just, like, you know...

1703
01:18:56,505 --> 01:18:58,670
being more attentive
to be better than me?

1704
01:18:58,672 --> 01:19:02,338
To, like...
to beat me at parenting?

1705
01:19:02,772 --> 01:19:04,472
Yeah. But I always do that.

1706
01:19:05,772 --> 01:19:07,670
Yeah, but, I mean,
isn't that ridiculous?

1707
01:19:07,672 --> 01:19:08,772
Yeah.

1708
01:19:09,005 --> 01:19:10,505
But I always want to win.

1709
01:19:11,705 --> 01:19:14,472
Yeah, of course.

1710
01:19:21,438 --> 01:19:22,338
Fuck.

1711
01:19:25,005 --> 01:19:26,505
Yeah. I knew you'd say that.

1712
01:19:27,739 --> 01:19:29,971
Unbelievable.
The passive aggressive.

1713
01:19:31,005 --> 01:19:33,737
My mom said
that she didn't want to, uh,

1714
01:19:33,739 --> 01:19:36,505
meddle in-in my marriage.

1715
01:19:37,938 --> 01:19:39,871
Which is exactly
what meddlers say...

1716
01:19:41,039 --> 01:19:42,739
before they meddle
in your marriage.

1717
01:19:44,005 --> 01:19:46,572
Uh... My kids, um...

1718
01:19:47,772 --> 01:19:49,670
My kids though, I know...

1719
01:19:49,672 --> 01:19:52,670
They'd probably be happy to know
that we're together. You know?

1720
01:19:52,672 --> 01:19:54,403
I mean,
I think this would make them...

1721
01:19:54,405 --> 01:19:56,503
But we cannot tell 'em.

1722
01:19:56,505 --> 01:20:00,739
Because what if the wheels
come off this particular bus?

1723
01:20:02,572 --> 01:20:03,871
That's what I'm worried about.

1724
01:20:04,871 --> 01:20:09,772
But until then, I'm just
enjoying this wild ride...

1725
01:20:10,971 --> 01:20:11,772
of...

1726
01:20:14,639 --> 01:20:17,971
having an affair
with my ex-wife.

1727
01:20:19,905 --> 01:20:21,537
Hey, man,
just came down on my break.

1728
01:20:21,539 --> 01:20:23,739
I wanted to watch your act.
It's good. Getting better.

1729
01:20:23,971 --> 01:20:25,936
- Come on. One more time!
- Thanks, man.

1730
01:20:25,938 --> 01:20:26,869
Excuse me.

1731
01:20:26,871 --> 01:20:28,903
Well, well, well.

1732
01:20:28,905 --> 01:20:31,739
I heard you crushed the other
night with some new material.

1733
01:20:33,472 --> 01:20:34,570
You smoked my weed
and you owe me money.

1734
01:20:34,572 --> 01:20:36,770
Just gonna go out
on a limb and say I think...

1735
01:20:36,772 --> 01:20:38,403
Novak, let me get it straight.

1736
01:20:38,405 --> 01:20:41,603
So, your main is your side
and your side is the main.

1737
01:20:41,605 --> 01:20:42,637
The new main.

1738
01:20:42,639 --> 01:20:43,670
- The new main.
- Yeah.

1739
01:20:43,672 --> 01:20:44,869
That's like going to Popeyes

1740
01:20:44,871 --> 01:20:46,004
and gettin' chicken
and chicken on the side.

1741
01:20:46,006 --> 01:20:48,438
"Let me get wings
with a side of wings."

1742
01:20:48,672 --> 01:20:50,936
My grandma used to say
gettin' back with a ex

1743
01:20:50,938 --> 01:20:52,972
is like taking a shit and trying
to put it back in your asshole.

1744
01:20:54,438 --> 01:20:56,037
- Fuck you guys.
- Just let go!

1745
01:20:56,039 --> 01:20:57,336
Fuck you too, Novak!

1746
01:20:57,338 --> 01:20:58,772
Hey, love you, young Novak.

1747
01:21:00,472 --> 01:21:02,537
Yeah. Here we go!
Ready? Cover, cover!

1748
01:21:02,539 --> 01:21:04,537
Wait, you aced five.

1749
01:21:04,539 --> 01:21:06,603
I mean, she could not pass
the float serve.

1750
01:21:06,605 --> 01:21:08,004
And our hitter was on fire, too.

1751
01:21:08,006 --> 01:21:09,739
Well, you had
that great last swing.

1752
01:21:18,006 --> 01:21:19,405
You're nuts!

1753
01:21:22,572 --> 01:21:24,072
- What are you doing?
- What?

1754
01:21:26,539 --> 01:21:29,370
You drove all this way from
the city just to drive me home?

1755
01:21:29,372 --> 01:21:31,072
It's a 47-minute drive.
It's not a big deal.

1756
01:21:34,705 --> 01:21:35,805
This is scary.

1757
01:21:36,705 --> 01:21:38,372
But fuck, it's fun.

1758
01:21:40,006 --> 01:21:40,939
Yeah.

1759
01:21:44,972 --> 01:21:46,104
- Is that Mom?
- Is that Mom?

1760
01:21:46,106 --> 01:21:48,037
- Yeah.
- Whoa! That's cool.

1761
01:21:48,039 --> 01:21:49,037
What do you think?

1762
01:21:49,039 --> 01:21:50,070
Pretty cool.

1763
01:21:50,072 --> 01:21:51,006
That's really cool, yeah.

1764
01:21:54,739 --> 01:21:55,937
Is that when
she was in the Olympics?

1765
01:21:55,939 --> 01:21:58,539
Yeah. What do you think?
It's pretty awesome right?

1766
01:21:58,906 --> 01:21:59,739
- Yeah.
- Hi, Mom.

1767
01:22:19,739 --> 01:22:21,072
Oh, shit.

1768
01:22:22,572 --> 01:22:23,739
Shit.

1769
01:22:25,906 --> 01:22:28,037
Just like every year.
There he is.

1770
01:22:28,039 --> 01:22:31,070
Oh!

1771
01:22:31,072 --> 01:22:33,370
I thought you guys
didn't make it.

1772
01:22:33,372 --> 01:22:34,904
I was looking at all the...

1773
01:22:34,906 --> 01:22:36,937
- Hey, buddy.
- Hey, hey, hey!

1774
01:22:36,939 --> 01:22:40,603
Somebody actually fell asleep on
my shoulder while I was there.

1775
01:22:40,605 --> 01:22:42,070
- Hey.
- Hey. Can I give you a hand?

1776
01:22:42,072 --> 01:22:43,570
No, man, I got these.
They're light.

1777
01:22:43,572 --> 01:22:44,904
How are you?

1778
01:22:44,906 --> 01:22:46,338
- I'm good. How are you doing?
- Great.

1779
01:22:48,006 --> 01:22:50,403
- You like my 'stache?
- Yeah. What's with the look?

1780
01:22:50,405 --> 01:22:52,004
The look? I've got a...

1781
01:22:52,006 --> 01:22:54,937
I got a fourth callback
of a ranch hand

1782
01:22:54,939 --> 01:22:56,603
in a western TV series.

1783
01:22:56,605 --> 01:22:57,870
- What? No!
- Good.

1784
01:22:57,872 --> 01:22:59,104
- Yeah.
- It's a strong 'stache.

1785
01:22:59,106 --> 01:23:01,104
- Yeah, yeah. I'm just grateful.
- Nice.

1786
01:23:01,106 --> 01:23:02,503
- Here.
- Thanks, man.

1787
01:23:02,505 --> 01:23:03,505
Shotgun!

1788
01:23:05,805 --> 01:23:07,336
Yeah, I know where it is.

1789
01:23:07,338 --> 01:23:09,503
- Yeah. Yeah.
- Jesus. Wow.

1790
01:23:09,505 --> 01:23:10,904
I'm just excited.
What do you want me to say?

1791
01:23:10,906 --> 01:23:11,770
- Yeah, all right.
- Wow, thrilling.

1792
01:23:11,772 --> 01:23:13,705
What do you know?

1793
01:23:14,438 --> 01:23:15,372
Jesus.

1794
01:23:18,939 --> 01:23:19,772
Where's she at?

1795
01:23:21,106 --> 01:23:22,870
Hey!
Welcome to Oyster Bay!

1796
01:23:22,872 --> 01:23:24,639
- Hey!
- Whoo!

1797
01:23:26,039 --> 01:23:27,436
My God.

1798
01:23:27,438 --> 01:23:28,503
I can't believe
it's been a year already.

1799
01:23:28,505 --> 01:23:29,737
- I know.
- Did that Hopkins thing.

1800
01:23:29,739 --> 01:23:31,436
- You've been working hard.
- Learn it 250 times.

1801
01:23:31,438 --> 01:23:32,937
You're in the attic, of course.

1802
01:23:32,939 --> 01:23:34,436
- Great.
- I'm so happy to be back here.

1803
01:23:34,438 --> 01:23:36,403
Geoffrey, Stephen,
you guys are in the primary.

1804
01:23:36,405 --> 01:23:37,937
Game night tonight still?

1805
01:23:37,939 --> 01:23:39,403
- Are we still doing that?
- Yeah.

1806
01:23:39,405 --> 01:23:40,870
- For sure.
- What are we playing?

1807
01:23:40,872 --> 01:23:42,503
Alex, you want
something to drink?

1808
01:23:42,505 --> 01:23:43,972
- Yeah, yeah, yeah.
- Same thing we play every year.

1809
01:23:44,605 --> 01:23:46,537
- Why don't we play...
- Same thing we...

1810
01:23:46,539 --> 01:23:47,703
Why don't we do Bananagrams?

1811
01:23:47,705 --> 01:23:48,870
- I got all the...
- What?

1812
01:23:48,872 --> 01:23:49,904
- What did you say?
- Are you unhappy wi...

1813
01:23:49,906 --> 01:23:51,739
Whoa, whoa, whoa.
We know what game we're playing.

1814
01:23:53,505 --> 01:23:54,737
I'm just saying, why
don't we start with Bananagrams?

1815
01:23:54,739 --> 01:23:55,937
No!

1816
01:23:55,939 --> 01:23:57,336
Why would we change it?

1817
01:23:57,338 --> 01:23:58,436
What are you talking about?

1818
01:23:58,438 --> 01:23:59,837
It's the best game in the...
It's why we come here.

1819
01:23:59,839 --> 01:24:00,804
Okay.

1820
01:24:00,806 --> 01:24:01,906
Hey, hey, hey...

1821
01:24:12,539 --> 01:24:14,072
Hey guys, wait,
don't start without me.

1822
01:24:18,672 --> 01:24:20,336
Come on, y'all.

1823
01:24:20,338 --> 01:24:21,970
None of this fighting shit.
Come on.

1824
01:24:21,972 --> 01:24:23,870
Fun weekend. Let's go.
Come on, honey.

1825
01:24:23,872 --> 01:24:25,070
- Yeah.
- Okay.

1826
01:24:25,072 --> 01:24:26,670
- Remember what I said.
- I know.

1827
01:24:26,672 --> 01:24:28,370
- Jesus.
- Did they start without us?

1828
01:24:28,372 --> 01:24:30,037
- No. I told them not to.
- Okay.

1829
01:24:30,039 --> 01:24:31,670
- Yeah, so, it's our time to ask.
- All right.

1830
01:24:31,672 --> 01:24:32,738
Obviously I meant...

1831
01:24:32,740 --> 01:24:33,904
Are you sure? Okay.

1832
01:24:33,906 --> 01:24:35,436
Look, I have four left.

1833
01:24:35,438 --> 01:24:36,738
Well, you think.

1834
01:24:36,740 --> 01:24:37,972
Wait, wait.
I can't see. I can't see.

1835
01:24:38,572 --> 01:24:40,804
I... Ho...
Whoa, whoa, whoa.

1836
01:24:40,806 --> 01:24:42,771
Mm-mmm.
- Hold on.

1837
01:24:42,773 --> 01:24:44,037
God, I'd love to know
what this process is.

1838
01:24:44,039 --> 01:24:46,771
Second floor... I know! Gosh!

1839
01:24:46,773 --> 01:24:48,870
I know. What?

1840
01:24:48,872 --> 01:24:51,403
- Does this person...
- Guys, we gotta get serious now.

1841
01:24:51,405 --> 01:24:53,503
Does your person hold on
to library books

1842
01:24:53,505 --> 01:24:54,537
past their due date?

1843
01:24:54,539 --> 01:24:55,904
Yes!

1844
01:24:55,906 --> 01:24:57,603
- That's a good one!
- Yes, yes.

1845
01:24:57,605 --> 01:24:58,670
- No, no, no. No.
- No. That's a librarian.

1846
01:24:58,672 --> 01:24:59,804
- Yeah.
- Keep her up.

1847
01:24:59,806 --> 01:25:00,738
- No.
- You know, every year,

1848
01:25:00,740 --> 01:25:02,336
- this does not end well.
- No.

1849
01:25:02,338 --> 01:25:03,870
- No. Does not keep it past the...
- These two.

1850
01:25:03,872 --> 01:25:05,037
This person does not.

1851
01:25:05,039 --> 01:25:06,537
No. It's this person does.

1852
01:25:06,539 --> 01:25:07,670
It's this person,
it's this person.

1853
01:25:07,672 --> 01:25:08,603
Okay, we're ready to
make a guess.

1854
01:25:08,605 --> 01:25:09,704
Okay. Is your person...

1855
01:25:09,706 --> 01:25:10,605
- Joan?
- Joan.

1856
01:25:10,806 --> 01:25:13,503
Joan! Oh my God!

1857
01:25:13,505 --> 01:25:15,570
Yes! Yeah!

1858
01:25:15,572 --> 01:25:17,537
How good was that!

1859
01:25:17,539 --> 01:25:18,706
How good was that!

1860
01:25:21,639 --> 01:25:22,472
Hey.

1861
01:25:24,706 --> 01:25:25,939
- Hey, man.
- What are you doing?

1862
01:25:27,773 --> 01:25:29,305
Just having a smoke.

1863
01:25:31,806 --> 01:25:33,572
- Sit with you?
- Yeah.

1864
01:25:36,639 --> 01:25:37,740
Starting to rain.

1865
01:25:44,539 --> 01:25:45,804
Not gonna ask me
what I was doing

1866
01:25:45,806 --> 01:25:47,470
coming out
of the fucking darkness?

1867
01:25:47,472 --> 01:25:50,039
Sorry, man. What were you doing?

1868
01:25:54,372 --> 01:25:55,872
I just want to say...

1869
01:25:57,338 --> 01:25:58,639
I gotta hand it to you.

1870
01:26:00,106 --> 01:26:02,539
- You do?
- Yeah. You look happy.

1871
01:26:04,839 --> 01:26:08,072
Happier than
you've been in a... long time.

1872
01:26:10,872 --> 01:26:11,972
Okay.

1873
01:26:12,839 --> 01:26:14,640
If anything,
you're an inspiration.

1874
01:26:15,572 --> 01:26:17,537
I mean, you're proof positive
that it's never too late

1875
01:26:17,539 --> 01:26:19,773
for a man of a certain age to
turn his life around, you know?

1876
01:26:20,640 --> 01:26:21,706
Make a fresh start.

1877
01:26:22,405 --> 01:26:24,839
Find out who you really are.

1878
01:26:26,872 --> 01:26:27,904
Thank you, man.

1879
01:26:27,906 --> 01:26:29,570
Right.

1880
01:26:29,572 --> 01:26:31,904
Which is why I'm gonna
ask Christine for a divorce.

1881
01:26:31,906 --> 01:26:33,004
What?

1882
01:26:33,006 --> 01:26:34,039
Yeah.

1883
01:26:34,572 --> 01:26:35,906
No. I hear ya.

1884
01:26:36,706 --> 01:26:38,505
I'm gonna do it.
I'm gonna take control.

1885
01:26:39,338 --> 01:26:41,006
No, what are you
talking about, man?

1886
01:26:41,372 --> 01:26:42,704
I just told you.
You inspired me.

1887
01:26:42,706 --> 01:26:44,104
No, no, no.
I didn't inspire you...

1888
01:26:44,106 --> 01:26:45,472
Yeah. You did.

1889
01:26:48,740 --> 01:26:50,470
I've been unhappy
for such a long time.

1890
01:26:50,472 --> 01:26:52,104
I was just too chicken-shit
to ever do anything about it.

1891
01:26:52,106 --> 01:26:53,604
No. Don't do this, man.

1892
01:26:53,606 --> 01:26:54,472
- Don't do it.
- Why not?

1893
01:26:55,438 --> 01:26:56,671
Our son's going to college.

1894
01:26:56,673 --> 01:26:59,606
If I get this job,
it shoots in Texas.

1895
01:27:00,539 --> 01:27:02,503
I've never auditioned
for anything outside the city

1896
01:27:02,505 --> 01:27:04,070
'cause I never wanted
to be away from Jay.

1897
01:27:04,072 --> 01:27:05,372
That's over.

1898
01:27:06,872 --> 01:27:08,505
I want to be happy.

1899
01:27:08,839 --> 01:27:10,671
Okay, that's fine.
But that doesn't mean that you...

1900
01:27:10,673 --> 01:27:13,039
- Don't you want me to be happy?
- No, of course I do, man.

1901
01:27:13,472 --> 01:27:14,806
Look...

1902
01:27:16,806 --> 01:27:18,505
Give me one good reason
why I shouldn't.

1903
01:27:25,740 --> 01:27:28,405
'Stache feels right. Feels good.

1904
01:27:34,839 --> 01:27:37,939
- Sorry. Kinda small, right?
- Hmm.

1905
01:27:42,006 --> 01:27:43,472
You need more blankets?

1906
01:27:43,872 --> 01:27:45,336
- No. I think I'm...
- Are you sure?

1907
01:27:45,338 --> 01:27:46,704
This one's kinda old.

1908
01:27:46,706 --> 01:27:48,704
No, they seem,
they seem okay. That's...

1909
01:27:48,706 --> 01:27:49,970
- Okay. Any more pillows?
- I'm good.

1910
01:27:49,972 --> 01:27:51,338
Anything?

1911
01:27:51,606 --> 01:27:53,070
No, this is great. Thank you.

1912
01:27:53,072 --> 01:27:55,573
Sorry. I know it's not
the biggest couch in the world.

1913
01:27:56,372 --> 01:27:57,839
It's gonna be fine. Thank you.

1914
01:27:58,906 --> 01:28:00,072
You want to know my secret?

1915
01:28:02,939 --> 01:28:03,872
Do I?

1916
01:28:04,338 --> 01:28:05,006
Yeah.

1917
01:28:06,606 --> 01:28:08,673
The real reason I despise you.

1918
01:28:10,972 --> 01:28:11,806
Yeah, I guess.

1919
01:28:14,540 --> 01:28:16,305
It's because you remind me
of myself.

1920
01:28:18,372 --> 01:28:19,939
Surprise.

1921
01:28:21,438 --> 01:28:24,037
And watching you
wither away all these years

1922
01:28:24,039 --> 01:28:27,470
just keeps reminding me
of how hot you used to be.

1923
01:28:27,472 --> 01:28:29,037
How funny you were.

1924
01:28:29,039 --> 01:28:30,438
Just, magnetic.

1925
01:28:33,338 --> 01:28:34,970
I was even attracted to you
back in the day.

1926
01:28:34,972 --> 01:28:36,939
And I'm not hitting on you,
I'm just making a point.

1927
01:28:38,706 --> 01:28:40,704
Watching you disappear
in front of my eyes

1928
01:28:40,706 --> 01:28:44,806
has just been
this fucking reminder to me.

1929
01:28:46,806 --> 01:28:48,405
That marriage
doesn't fucking work.

1930
01:28:50,438 --> 01:28:51,872
I mean, it didn't work
for my parents.

1931
01:28:53,039 --> 01:28:55,604
I literally watched it
kill them.

1932
01:28:55,606 --> 01:28:56,937
And then it killed you.

1933
01:28:56,939 --> 01:28:59,305
And now it's doing
the same thing to me.

1934
01:29:01,606 --> 01:29:05,336
And I wake up every day,

1935
01:29:05,338 --> 01:29:08,540
and the first thing I feel
is anger.

1936
01:29:10,338 --> 01:29:12,606
I'm just fucking angry
all the time.

1937
01:29:14,039 --> 01:29:16,037
So, yes, when I see you,
I see me.

1938
01:29:16,039 --> 01:29:17,972
And I just fucking lash out,
you know?

1939
01:29:20,806 --> 01:29:22,540
I'll deny
we ever had this conversation.

1940
01:29:23,939 --> 01:29:24,806
Okay.

1941
01:29:26,806 --> 01:29:28,370
But I'm glad we talked.

1942
01:29:28,372 --> 01:29:29,773
It's like we needed it, maybe?

1943
01:29:31,706 --> 01:29:33,039
Yeah. Get some sleep.

1944
01:30:19,506 --> 01:30:24,004
<i>♪ Amazing grace ♪</i>

1945
01:30:24,006 --> 01:30:25,473
Morning.

1946
01:30:26,573 --> 01:30:30,706
<i>♪ How sweet the sound ♪</i>

1947
01:30:32,939 --> 01:30:38,473
<i>♪ That saved a wretch ♪</i>

1948
01:30:38,806 --> 01:30:43,338
<i>♪ Like me ♪</i>

1949
01:30:43,872 --> 01:30:49,573
<i>♪ I once was lost ♪</i>

1950
01:30:50,039 --> 01:30:55,738
<i>♪ But now am found ♪</i>

1951
01:30:55,740 --> 01:30:58,471
<i>♪ Was blind ♪</i>

1952
01:30:58,473 --> 01:31:04,336
<i>♪ But now I see ♪</i>

1953
01:31:04,338 --> 01:31:07,070
Ooh.

1954
01:31:07,072 --> 01:31:12,738
<i>♪ Amazing grace ♪</i>

1955
01:31:12,740 --> 01:31:18,072
<i>♪ How sweet the sound ♪</i>

1956
01:31:18,673 --> 01:31:24,104
<i>♪ That saved a wretch ♪</i>

1957
01:31:24,106 --> 01:31:28,506
<i>♪ Like me ♪</i>

1958
01:31:30,406 --> 01:31:31,437
How'd you sleep?

1959
01:31:31,439 --> 01:31:32,872
- Amazing.
- Yeah?

1960
01:31:34,540 --> 01:31:36,471
- Really good.
- Did you?

1961
01:31:36,473 --> 01:31:38,339
- The couch is good.
- Is it?

1962
01:31:40,439 --> 01:31:41,837
I got it.

1963
01:31:41,839 --> 01:31:47,106
<i>♪ Was blind, but now... ♪</i>

1964
01:31:48,606 --> 01:31:49,740
- Yeah.
- You know?

1965
01:31:50,706 --> 01:31:54,540
I know it's been
a difficult time for... some.

1966
01:31:55,039 --> 01:31:56,506
A lot of change.

1967
01:31:57,439 --> 01:31:58,939
But that's okay.

1968
01:31:59,573 --> 01:32:02,740
Um... You know, I read a line
in a book once.

1969
01:32:03,506 --> 01:32:05,037
I don't remember
exactly how it goes,

1970
01:32:05,039 --> 01:32:06,538
but it was something like,

1971
01:32:06,540 --> 01:32:09,906
"People change.
But love always stays the same."

1972
01:32:11,473 --> 01:32:12,606
Anybody?

1973
01:32:13,806 --> 01:32:17,104
Mmm. Yeah, I don't see how
that relates exactly, but okay.

1974
01:32:17,106 --> 01:32:19,437
- No. I loved it. I loved it.
- It's really nice.

1975
01:32:19,439 --> 01:32:20,437
- I think it's nice.
- Actually,

1976
01:32:20,439 --> 01:32:21,872
since you brought it up.

1977
01:32:22,473 --> 01:32:24,970
I have my own toast
that I would like to make

1978
01:32:24,972 --> 01:32:26,437
to a very special
friend of mine.

1979
01:32:26,439 --> 01:32:27,437
Oh, thank you.

1980
01:32:27,439 --> 01:32:28,738
- Her name is Tess.
- Oh.

1981
01:32:28,740 --> 01:32:30,404
Um, as you all know,

1982
01:32:30,406 --> 01:32:32,404
she recently returned
to her life's passion.

1983
01:32:32,406 --> 01:32:33,671
Mmm. Okay.

1984
01:32:33,673 --> 01:32:35,037
And even though
she's only been at it

1985
01:32:35,039 --> 01:32:36,738
for a short period of time...

1986
01:32:36,740 --> 01:32:37,904
What, like a few months?

1987
01:32:37,906 --> 01:32:38,939
Yeah, but...

1988
01:32:39,473 --> 01:32:41,571
No, this is amazing.

1989
01:32:41,573 --> 01:32:45,037
She has already been asked
to be the assistant coach

1990
01:32:45,039 --> 01:32:47,671
for the US Women's Team,

1991
01:32:47,673 --> 01:32:49,671
- LA '28!
- What?

1992
01:32:49,673 --> 01:32:51,704
- What? Oh my God!
- No decisions, guys.

1993
01:32:51,706 --> 01:32:52,771
No. It's just...

1994
01:32:52,773 --> 01:32:54,037
- You! Get up here!
- No.

1995
01:32:54,039 --> 01:32:55,837
- Yes, please.
- Come here. Oh, my God.

1996
01:32:55,839 --> 01:32:56,872
That is so...

1997
01:32:59,573 --> 01:33:02,970
Okay. So, it was not supposed to
go down like that.

1998
01:33:02,972 --> 01:33:03,738
Don't worry about it.
It's totally fine.

1999
01:33:03,740 --> 01:33:05,037
I'm really sorry
she announced it.

2000
01:33:05,039 --> 01:33:06,538
She happened to be at the house.

2001
01:33:06,540 --> 01:33:07,638
It's okay. It's great.

2002
01:33:07,640 --> 01:33:08,804
It's great news!

2003
01:33:08,806 --> 01:33:09,771
It's just such a big deal
to tell you.

2004
01:33:09,773 --> 01:33:11,337
- I know.
- But it is a big deal.

2005
01:33:11,339 --> 01:33:12,538
- It's big... a huge deal.
- Right? That they asked me.

2006
01:33:12,540 --> 01:33:13,837
That's so... You deserve it, too.

2007
01:33:13,839 --> 01:33:15,671
But I have no idea
if I want to do it.

2008
01:33:15,673 --> 01:33:17,404
- You should.
- It would be a lot.

2009
01:33:17,406 --> 01:33:20,371
It would be a lot. You know.

2010
01:33:20,373 --> 01:33:21,870
And the boys. And...

2011
01:33:21,872 --> 01:33:23,671
- Actually, you know what?
- I don't know how I feel.

2012
01:33:23,673 --> 01:33:25,070
I don't even know
what it would be like,

2013
01:33:25,072 --> 01:33:26,773
- or what the commitment is.
- Look at, look at this.

2014
01:33:27,972 --> 01:33:29,604
- What?
- Something funny I just...

2015
01:33:29,606 --> 01:33:30,740
Look at that.

2016
01:33:31,406 --> 01:33:33,104
- That's you.
- Wait. Where is this?

2017
01:33:33,106 --> 01:33:35,337
That's...
I found that photo of you

2018
01:33:35,339 --> 01:33:37,904
and I blew it up and I put it
on the wall of my apartment.

2019
01:33:37,906 --> 01:33:39,070
'Cause I wanted the boys to see

2020
01:33:39,072 --> 01:33:40,339
what a fucking legend
their mom is.

2021
01:33:42,606 --> 01:33:46,306
Why didn't you pick a photo of
me with the kids for your wall?

2022
01:33:46,773 --> 01:33:50,704
No, because I got a photo of you
at the height of your power.

2023
01:33:50,706 --> 01:33:52,738
Look at you.
Look how high you are.

2024
01:33:52,740 --> 01:33:54,538
That is sick!
I mean, are you kidding?

2025
01:33:54,540 --> 01:33:57,704
Just be like... Smash! You know?

2026
01:33:57,706 --> 01:34:00,538
Like, that's unbelievable.
It's their favorite thing.

2027
01:34:00,540 --> 01:34:03,006
I love it, too. I think...
That photo is awesome.

2028
01:34:04,673 --> 01:34:05,806
It's not me now.

2029
01:34:09,706 --> 01:34:10,640
Yeah, it is.

2030
01:34:13,373 --> 01:34:14,439
No, it isn't.

2031
01:34:15,606 --> 01:34:16,473
Here.

2032
01:34:20,540 --> 01:34:22,504
Do you have to sleep till like
two fucking thirty every day?

2033
01:34:22,506 --> 01:34:23,738
Why? Did people wake up already?

2034
01:34:23,740 --> 01:34:24,806
Oh, my God.

2035
01:34:25,506 --> 01:34:27,373
What are we looking at? Oh!

2036
01:34:28,473 --> 01:34:29,471
I'm not sure
what's happening right now.

2037
01:34:29,473 --> 01:34:30,439
I'm upset.

2038
01:34:31,439 --> 01:34:32,506
That's what's happening.

2039
01:34:32,872 --> 01:34:33,773
Okay.

2040
01:34:35,640 --> 01:34:37,740
You can upset me,
and I can upset you.

2041
01:34:38,606 --> 01:34:39,673
Right?

2042
01:34:40,406 --> 01:34:42,039
It's what happens
in a relationship.

2043
01:34:42,906 --> 01:34:45,839
I never said that we
couldn't get upset.

2044
01:34:48,573 --> 01:34:50,473
I know you were trying
to do a nice thing.

2045
01:34:54,806 --> 01:34:57,839
It hurt my feelings.
Let's go in.

2046
01:35:00,039 --> 01:35:02,771
Are you... Do you still want me
to come to the attic tonight?

2047
01:35:02,773 --> 01:35:04,906
What?

2048
01:35:06,773 --> 01:35:07,671
What about this?

2049
01:35:07,673 --> 01:35:08,806
That's fine.

2050
01:35:09,606 --> 01:35:10,839
- Space?
- Okay. Jesus.

2051
01:35:14,072 --> 01:35:15,439
I'm starving.

2052
01:35:16,439 --> 01:35:18,404
Well, why don't you use a spoon
like a person?

2053
01:35:18,406 --> 01:35:20,640
Oh. Well, I don't want to dirty
any more dishes.

2054
01:35:21,006 --> 01:35:22,937
Well, we can wash them
in the morning.

2055
01:35:22,939 --> 01:35:24,306
Oh, okay.

2056
01:35:25,872 --> 01:35:27,506
It's so good with my fingers.

2057
01:35:30,740 --> 01:35:32,471
Shouldn't have done
that one thing, you know?

2058
01:35:32,473 --> 01:35:33,972
Jesus Christ.

2059
01:35:55,972 --> 01:35:58,671
House is busy tonight.

2060
01:35:58,673 --> 01:36:00,373
Anybody see you come up?

2061
01:36:00,673 --> 01:36:02,638
No, everybody was
kind of in their own world.

2062
01:36:02,640 --> 01:36:05,870
I was watching this video of
a therapist talking to couples,

2063
01:36:05,872 --> 01:36:09,571
and had them,
as a healthy exercise,

2064
01:36:09,573 --> 01:36:11,506
ask each other what they
don't like about each other.

2065
01:36:13,806 --> 01:36:15,872
That you slept with somebody,
for starters.

2066
01:36:16,540 --> 01:36:18,337
Well, I only did
because I thought you were

2067
01:36:18,339 --> 01:36:18,972
and I was jealous.

2068
01:36:20,606 --> 01:36:22,771
How you never respond
to photos I send you.

2069
01:36:22,773 --> 01:36:24,504
Photos you always ask for.

2070
01:36:24,506 --> 01:36:26,671
I always send a thumbs-up
or a heart emoji or something.

2071
01:36:26,673 --> 01:36:28,437
I'm sitting there,
rushing around,

2072
01:36:28,439 --> 01:36:31,839
trying to get some perfect angle
of a photo for them.

2073
01:36:32,439 --> 01:36:34,404
Just so that... You know,

2074
01:36:34,406 --> 01:36:35,904
I just felt like a psycho.

2075
01:36:35,906 --> 01:36:38,471
Feel like an idiot,
knowing you could care less.

2076
01:36:38,473 --> 01:36:39,872
I love getting those photos.
That's not true.

2077
01:36:41,540 --> 01:36:43,406
How quiet you got at home.

2078
01:36:45,439 --> 01:36:46,837
As if you were
a different person

2079
01:36:46,839 --> 01:36:48,105
than you are
with everybody else.

2080
01:36:48,107 --> 01:36:49,804
That drove me crazy.

2081
01:36:49,806 --> 01:36:52,571
Well... no, first...

2082
01:36:52,573 --> 01:36:54,471
Jeez, you're good at this game.

2083
01:36:54,473 --> 01:36:56,040
First that confused me.

2084
01:36:56,673 --> 01:36:58,872
Then made me sad,
then drove me crazy.

2085
01:37:01,740 --> 01:37:04,306
As if we clearly weren't
interesting enough for you.

2086
01:37:05,040 --> 01:37:06,773
I wasn't.

2087
01:37:08,839 --> 01:37:10,439
It was like
you weren't even there.

2088
01:37:12,040 --> 01:37:13,473
I wasn't there?

2089
01:37:14,406 --> 01:37:16,604
- You checked out.
- Me?

2090
01:37:16,606 --> 01:37:18,071
Just like you would
after a loss.

2091
01:37:18,073 --> 01:37:19,504
Except for
I wouldn't know the cause,

2092
01:37:19,506 --> 01:37:20,939
and so I'm just like, alone.

2093
01:37:22,773 --> 01:37:25,107
Well, good thing
we aren't together.

2094
01:37:28,939 --> 01:37:30,306
Aren't we?

2095
01:37:31,306 --> 01:37:34,573
Well, I don't think us hiding is
us back together.

2096
01:37:35,007 --> 01:37:37,073
Well, what do you care
what anyone thinks, anyway?

2097
01:37:38,872 --> 01:37:40,406
Maybe I'm embarrassed.

2098
01:37:41,339 --> 01:37:42,439
By what?

2099
01:37:44,506 --> 01:37:45,906
- Me.
- Why?

2100
01:37:48,872 --> 01:37:50,773
'Cause I don't know
if you even love me.

2101
01:37:54,906 --> 01:37:57,673
You love some idea of me,
hanging on your wall.

2102
01:37:59,406 --> 01:38:01,404
But not the woman
you're looking at right now,

2103
01:38:01,406 --> 01:38:02,804
-in front of you
-Don't tell me

2104
01:38:02,806 --> 01:38:03,971
- in this moment.
- How I feel and think.

2105
01:38:03,973 --> 01:38:05,073
That's not...

2106
01:38:06,973 --> 01:38:09,471
I mean, maybe I don't love you.
I don't know.

2107
01:38:09,473 --> 01:38:11,604
Maybe I fucked you
because you fucked that woman,

2108
01:38:11,606 --> 01:38:13,538
or 'cause it felt good
to hear you say

2109
01:38:13,540 --> 01:38:14,870
you missed me
in front of strangers,

2110
01:38:14,872 --> 01:38:16,638
- which is... embarrassing.
- Whoa, whoa, whoa.

2111
01:38:16,640 --> 01:38:18,738
It was a stupid fucking thing
I did, and I hate myself for it.

2112
01:38:18,740 --> 01:38:22,538
Why? We had no responsibility
to each other.

2113
01:38:22,540 --> 01:38:24,437
Even now,
there's no real commitment.

2114
01:38:24,439 --> 01:38:26,071
- Of course there is.
- To what?

2115
01:38:26,073 --> 01:38:28,005
To making each other happy.

2116
01:38:28,007 --> 01:38:29,738
Because we're doing things
that make us happy

2117
01:38:29,740 --> 01:38:31,071
as individuals now.

2118
01:38:31,073 --> 01:38:33,071
And if we're happy, that's it.

2119
01:38:33,073 --> 01:38:35,738
Then we make
the people we love happy too.

2120
01:38:35,740 --> 01:38:37,640
That's it?
What are you, eight years old?

2121
01:38:38,506 --> 01:38:40,704
A real relationship

2122
01:38:40,706 --> 01:38:43,771
is finding somebody
you can also be unhappy with.

2123
01:38:43,773 --> 01:38:45,007
Somebody who has your back.

2124
01:38:46,573 --> 01:38:48,872
We stopped
having each other's backs.

2125
01:38:49,073 --> 01:38:51,706
I always tried to have
your back. Are you kidding me?

2126
01:38:52,439 --> 01:38:53,837
There just wasn't enough room

2127
01:38:53,839 --> 01:38:55,105
because had to
have your own back.

2128
01:38:55,107 --> 01:38:57,371
There wasn't any room left
on your back.

2129
01:38:57,373 --> 01:38:59,771
Trust me, I heard.
"Alex, he loves it so much.

2130
01:38:59,773 --> 01:39:01,071
He's always there for you.

2131
01:39:01,073 --> 01:39:03,105
He goes to everything.
He loves it."

2132
01:39:03,107 --> 01:39:05,940
- I did.
- Yeah? And when I retired?

2133
01:39:09,107 --> 01:39:12,571
When I let go of the thing
I loved since I was 11?

2134
01:39:12,573 --> 01:39:13,640
You shut off.

2135
01:39:15,740 --> 01:39:17,471
You said you felt alone?

2136
01:39:17,473 --> 01:39:20,306
Baby, you left me alone
years ago in this relationship.

2137
01:39:24,973 --> 01:39:26,506
Okay, you want to
know the truth?

2138
01:39:27,007 --> 01:39:28,073
Yes.

2139
01:39:28,506 --> 01:39:29,640
I wasn't the downer.

2140
01:39:31,339 --> 01:39:32,306
You were.

2141
01:39:38,773 --> 01:39:41,973
You're right. I was a downer.

2142
01:39:44,873 --> 01:39:47,640
After years of dedicating myself
to a thing,

2143
01:39:48,406 --> 01:39:49,506
I thought I could just stop.

2144
01:39:51,706 --> 01:39:54,907
And have my own children,
and you be the replacement.

2145
01:39:58,840 --> 01:40:00,040
I did.

2146
01:40:02,940 --> 01:40:03,938
Never acknowledging

2147
01:40:03,940 --> 01:40:06,805
that it was the end
of this whole other life,

2148
01:40:06,807 --> 01:40:09,040
or where I was gonna
put all those feelings.

2149
01:40:09,473 --> 01:40:11,871
And then I was doing
six years of in vitro,

2150
01:40:11,873 --> 01:40:13,971
and injecting myself
full of all those chemicals,

2151
01:40:13,973 --> 01:40:15,771
whatever that was doing.

2152
01:40:15,773 --> 01:40:18,007
And by the way,
and I love that challenge.

2153
01:40:19,807 --> 01:40:24,838
But I was having trouble
with you and them

2154
01:40:24,840 --> 01:40:28,473
being the only thing
fulfilling me.

2155
01:40:31,673 --> 01:40:34,373
And you knew I was struggling.

2156
01:40:35,940 --> 01:40:38,040
But that I was too proud
to ever ask for help.

2157
01:40:39,807 --> 01:40:41,373
You hid behind that.

2158
01:40:43,339 --> 01:40:45,071
And I felt relieved.

2159
01:40:45,073 --> 01:40:46,905
That you never asked.

2160
01:40:46,907 --> 01:40:49,673
Because then
I could avoid it too.

2161
01:40:49,973 --> 01:40:51,471
I couldn't ask you that.

2162
01:40:51,473 --> 01:40:53,337
- Of course you could.
- No!

2163
01:40:53,339 --> 01:40:54,540
- Of course you could.
- Baby, baby...

2164
01:40:55,873 --> 01:40:57,337
You left me alone.

2165
01:40:57,339 --> 01:40:58,805
I left you alone?

2166
01:40:58,807 --> 01:41:00,638
You checked out.

2167
01:41:00,640 --> 01:41:02,371
You think
that was fun to be around?

2168
01:41:02,373 --> 01:41:04,938
I don't want to go back to that.
I won't!

2169
01:41:04,940 --> 01:41:06,772
- So what are you saying then?
- What I'm s...

2170
01:41:06,774 --> 01:41:08,538
Fuck! Oh, fucking stupid...

2171
01:41:08,540 --> 01:41:09,671
What the fuck?

2172
01:41:09,673 --> 01:41:11,538
Jesus fucking Christ, Christine!

2173
01:41:11,540 --> 01:41:13,905
Why don't you mind your own
fucking business for once?

2174
01:41:13,907 --> 01:41:15,404
Whoa.

2175
01:41:15,406 --> 01:41:16,940
Maybe take care
of your own shit first.

2176
01:41:17,439 --> 01:41:18,571
What the fuck
is that supposed to mean?

2177
01:41:18,573 --> 01:41:20,406
<i>Comedy,
make some noise right now!</i>

2178
01:41:20,907 --> 01:41:24,439
For my main man, the one
and only, Alex Novak everybody!

2179
01:41:52,040 --> 01:41:53,673
Fucking relationships suck.

2180
01:41:56,907 --> 01:41:58,671
And I don't mean that they...
they're like a downer.

2181
01:41:58,673 --> 01:42:00,339
I mean, they fucking suck.

2182
01:42:02,406 --> 01:42:04,404
I don't think you're fucking
hearing what I'm trying to say.

2183
01:42:04,406 --> 01:42:06,504
I'm telling you
that relationships suck.

2184
01:42:06,506 --> 01:42:09,105
Like, if you are in
a relationship with somebody,

2185
01:42:09,107 --> 01:42:10,604
they are literally
trying to suck

2186
01:42:10,606 --> 01:42:11,774
the fucking life out of you.

2187
01:42:13,774 --> 01:42:15,807
Okay? They're fucking vampires.

2188
01:42:19,473 --> 01:42:21,705
And the moment that
you're happy, fucking look out.

2189
01:42:21,707 --> 01:42:23,638
The moment that
you are fucking happy,

2190
01:42:23,640 --> 01:42:27,371
they see that as pure,
unfiltered fucking blood,

2191
01:42:27,373 --> 01:42:29,538
and they will suck it
right out of your fucking body

2192
01:42:29,540 --> 01:42:32,105
until you are gaunt
and fucking drained.

2193
01:42:32,107 --> 01:42:34,772
And they will take
every fucking morsel of it out.

2194
01:42:34,774 --> 01:42:38,373
Because you know why? Because
happiness is the sun to them.

2195
01:42:39,007 --> 01:42:41,805
Okay? Happiness is like a stake
to the fucking heart.

2196
01:42:41,807 --> 01:42:43,071
They don't want it.

2197
01:42:43,073 --> 01:42:45,339
They don't want you
to be fucking happy.

2198
01:42:46,540 --> 01:42:48,005
And there are only two ways out

2199
01:42:48,007 --> 01:42:51,705
of this fucking
bleak, miserable existence.

2200
01:42:51,707 --> 01:42:54,606
You either become one of them
or you fucking die.

2201
01:42:56,506 --> 01:42:57,641
Well, I don't want it.

2202
01:42:59,007 --> 01:43:02,439
I don't wanna be
a fucking vampire. Okay?

2203
01:43:04,774 --> 01:43:06,873
I don't want it.

2204
01:43:25,406 --> 01:43:26,540
Dad.

2205
01:43:27,406 --> 01:43:28,404
What the fuck
are you doing here?

2206
01:43:28,406 --> 01:43:29,506
Son, uh...

2207
01:43:30,473 --> 01:43:33,404
Well, I just came down
to see what the fuss is.

2208
01:43:33,406 --> 01:43:34,805
Jesus...

2209
01:43:34,807 --> 01:43:38,073
You... really yelled
at those guys.

2210
01:43:40,707 --> 01:43:43,538
Yeah, sorry, I don't really know
what that all was.

2211
01:43:43,540 --> 01:43:48,607
Yeah, well, I wouldn't say
it was funny, but it was, uh...

2212
01:43:49,840 --> 01:43:51,007
a bit dangerous.

2213
01:43:53,473 --> 01:43:54,437
- Dad, look...
- Son.

2214
01:43:54,439 --> 01:43:55,373
- No, Dad, listen...
- Son.

2215
01:43:56,807 --> 01:43:59,439
You're a decent man, Alex.

2216
01:44:00,506 --> 01:44:02,504
And you can give yourself

2217
01:44:02,506 --> 01:44:04,707
the grace to
work through all of this.

2218
01:44:05,574 --> 01:44:06,774
You know?

2219
01:44:07,674 --> 01:44:09,437
Mom.

2220
01:44:09,439 --> 01:44:12,105
Yeah, well, we rub off on
each other. That's a good thing.

2221
01:44:12,107 --> 01:44:15,873
Your mother and I,
we're lucky like that.

2222
01:44:16,807 --> 01:44:17,907
It's rare.

2223
01:44:19,840 --> 01:44:23,741
It's really rare.
You understand?

2224
01:44:30,574 --> 01:44:31,506
Okay.

2225
01:44:32,674 --> 01:44:33,973
It's okay. Come on.

2226
01:44:35,339 --> 01:44:36,306
Come on.

2227
01:44:37,541 --> 01:44:38,473
Hey.

2228
01:44:39,439 --> 01:44:40,641
There you go.

2229
01:44:44,073 --> 01:44:46,005
Now.

2230
01:44:46,007 --> 01:44:47,938
I'm sorry... I'm sorry about...

2231
01:44:47,940 --> 01:44:50,371
You... You don't have to
be sorry about anything.

2232
01:44:50,373 --> 01:44:53,705
Life happens to us, you know?

2233
01:44:53,707 --> 01:44:56,404
What we have to do is recognize

2234
01:44:56,406 --> 01:44:58,541
where we stand
and what's good about it.

2235
01:45:00,807 --> 01:45:01,774
It's gonna be okay.

2236
01:45:02,741 --> 01:45:04,641
Yeah? You work it through.

2237
01:45:07,507 --> 01:45:09,541
As for this, next time...

2238
01:45:11,373 --> 01:45:12,607
a few more jokes.

2239
01:45:13,507 --> 01:45:14,873
- See you.
- See ya.

2240
01:45:15,940 --> 01:45:17,641
I'll add <i>a</i> joke.

2241
01:46:02,040 --> 01:46:05,071
Hey, man. I got bagels.

2242
01:46:05,073 --> 01:46:06,541
Oh, for fuck's sake.

2243
01:46:07,940 --> 01:46:10,641
So, they didn't say it,
like, outright,

2244
01:46:11,541 --> 01:46:13,805
but my agent did tell me
that production

2245
01:46:13,807 --> 01:46:15,973
called them,
like, several times.

2246
01:46:16,406 --> 01:46:17,838
Maybe they want their hat back.

2247
01:46:17,840 --> 01:46:19,973
Will you just let me dream, bro?

2248
01:46:20,607 --> 01:46:21,973
No, you're probably right.

2249
01:46:22,707 --> 01:46:24,472
Look, man, I think
it's great that you got the job

2250
01:46:24,474 --> 01:46:27,337
and that you had
that experience, but...

2251
01:46:27,339 --> 01:46:28,705
I don't know,
now that you're back in town,

2252
01:46:28,707 --> 01:46:31,505
don't you think maybe
it's time that you face reality?

2253
01:46:31,507 --> 01:46:34,739
I have no delusions. Okay?

2254
01:46:34,741 --> 01:46:38,672
I know they killed my character,
but just think about it.

2255
01:46:38,674 --> 01:46:41,572
What if they bring him back
as a ghost seeking revenge?

2256
01:46:41,574 --> 01:46:42,905
I sketched out
this little storyline

2257
01:46:42,907 --> 01:46:44,405
I'm gonna send to production.

2258
01:46:44,407 --> 01:46:46,440
But I'm definitely gonna
give the hat back first.

2259
01:46:47,107 --> 01:46:49,373
But you never know.
I'm a good writer.

2260
01:46:50,674 --> 01:46:51,940
I was talking about
your marriage.

2261
01:46:52,574 --> 01:46:54,907
Oh.
What about it?

2262
01:46:55,774 --> 01:46:58,071
Well, I mean, just, everything,
you know, with Christine

2263
01:46:58,073 --> 01:47:00,807
and you leaving her
and all that.

2264
01:47:01,073 --> 01:47:03,073
Oh, no, no, no. No, we're good.

2265
01:47:04,107 --> 01:47:05,739
- Really?
- Yeah.

2266
01:47:05,741 --> 01:47:07,705
Yeah, yeah. We talked it out.

2267
01:47:07,707 --> 01:47:08,772
Yeah.

2268
01:47:08,774 --> 01:47:10,572
She said her piece...

2269
01:47:10,574 --> 01:47:13,572
which was hard to hear,
was good.

2270
01:47:13,574 --> 01:47:16,507
And then I said mine
and then, yeah. Yeah.

2271
01:47:17,607 --> 01:47:19,337
Oh. Check this out.

2272
01:47:19,339 --> 01:47:22,038
She wants me to go back
more than I do.

2273
01:47:22,040 --> 01:47:23,805
Yeah, she keeps saying,
"You should just write them.

2274
01:47:23,807 --> 01:47:25,607
They need to bring back
your character."

2275
01:47:26,940 --> 01:47:28,873
- Is that crazy?
- Mmm.

2276
01:47:30,674 --> 01:47:31,574
Yeah.

2277
01:47:34,474 --> 01:47:35,840
Hey, man, is there, um...

2278
01:47:38,707 --> 01:47:40,574
Is there a chance that she's...

2279
01:47:41,940 --> 01:47:43,374
I don't know,
that she wants you to...

2280
01:47:45,339 --> 01:47:46,907
I don't know, she wants
to get some time away from you?

2281
01:47:49,073 --> 01:47:50,073
Why?

2282
01:47:50,474 --> 01:47:51,938
You'll be out of town or...

2283
01:47:51,940 --> 01:47:53,674
She came with me to Texas.

2284
01:47:54,374 --> 01:47:55,071
- Really?
- Yeah.

2285
01:47:55,073 --> 01:47:56,505
She did?

2286
01:47:56,507 --> 01:47:57,907
Yeah. She was there
all nine days.

2287
01:47:59,940 --> 01:48:01,507
It was her idea
to steal the hat.

2288
01:48:02,641 --> 01:48:04,739
Yeah, she's like,
thinks I look...

2289
01:48:04,741 --> 01:48:06,574
you know, really handsome.

2290
01:48:07,641 --> 01:48:08,873
Wow, I'm confused.

2291
01:48:10,474 --> 01:48:11,938
Yeah, well, confused is good.

2292
01:48:11,940 --> 01:48:13,774
I'm confused most of the time.

2293
01:48:14,474 --> 01:48:15,807
I just like being confused
with her.

2294
01:48:17,707 --> 01:48:19,539
Who would have thought Jalen...

2295
01:48:19,541 --> 01:48:21,539
I love that guy...

2296
01:48:21,541 --> 01:48:23,607
but going away would
be actually good for us?

2297
01:48:25,707 --> 01:48:27,474
- Hmm.
- What is that behind me?

2298
01:48:29,541 --> 01:48:31,607
- That's a picture of Tess.
- Oh.

2299
01:48:32,707 --> 01:48:34,407
I can't see her face.

2300
01:48:34,940 --> 01:48:36,572
Well, yeah,
the photo's taken from behind.

2301
01:48:36,574 --> 01:48:38,574
Yeah, well, you should just
turn her around.

2302
01:48:39,007 --> 01:48:40,873
Yeah, I don't think...
I don't think they can do that.

2303
01:48:42,940 --> 01:48:44,073
Someday.

2304
01:49:10,907 --> 01:49:13,372
She's competed
every single night

2305
01:49:13,374 --> 01:49:14,805
of her college career.

2306
01:49:14,807 --> 01:49:16,739
She doesn't have as much
international experience,

2307
01:49:16,741 --> 01:49:19,005
but to be able to grind
through the Big Ten season

2308
01:49:19,007 --> 01:49:21,871
and make a big run
in the tournament...

2309
01:49:21,873 --> 01:49:23,505
- She's got what it takes.
- Played for John Cook too.

2310
01:49:23,507 --> 01:49:24,805
- John Cook.
- Exactly.

2311
01:49:24,807 --> 01:49:26,639
Is that Rachel,

2312
01:49:26,641 --> 01:49:28,574
who Arch
was saying came out of UVA?

2313
01:49:36,507 --> 01:49:37,607
- Hi.
- Hey.

2314
01:49:38,574 --> 01:49:40,105
- Uh, is everything...
- Everything's fine, yeah.

2315
01:49:40,107 --> 01:49:41,605
I just dropped the boys off
at school,

2316
01:49:41,607 --> 01:49:42,739
but I wanted to come by here

2317
01:49:42,741 --> 01:49:44,071
before I drove back
to the city...

2318
01:49:44,073 --> 01:49:45,739
I'm just in the middle of it

2319
01:49:45,741 --> 01:49:47,338
- with the coaching staff, so I...
- Okay. Okay, I just want...

2320
01:49:47,340 --> 01:49:48,707
I just wanna show you something
really quick.

2321
01:49:50,674 --> 01:49:53,472
- Look at that.
- What is that, Alex?

2322
01:49:53,474 --> 01:49:55,572
It's you. It's you.
First time you saw the minivan.

2323
01:49:55,574 --> 01:49:57,005
Look how unhappy you are.

2324
01:49:57,007 --> 01:49:58,440
It's my favorite thing.

2325
01:50:00,407 --> 01:50:01,307
I see that.

2326
01:50:03,007 --> 01:50:05,007
I realize that I was the one
who was unhappy.

2327
01:50:07,907 --> 01:50:10,574
I was unhappy in our marriage.

2328
01:50:10,907 --> 01:50:13,674
I wasn't unhappy
with our marriage.

2329
01:50:22,073 --> 01:50:23,707
I wanna be unhappy with you.

2330
01:50:27,474 --> 01:50:28,707
Let's be unhappy together.

2331
01:50:48,374 --> 01:50:50,672
Fuck!

2332
01:50:50,674 --> 01:50:51,774
I'll think about it.

2333
01:51:25,107 --> 01:51:28,772
<i>♪ Pressure
Pushing down on me ♪</i>

2334
01:51:28,774 --> 01:51:31,840
<i>Pressing down on you
No man ask for</i>

2335
01:51:32,873 --> 01:51:34,838
And in that moment,
I stood up and I said,

2336
01:51:34,840 --> 01:51:38,407
"Hey. Your mom
is not going anywhere...

2337
01:51:39,040 --> 01:51:41,073
till she helps me
open this jar."

2338
01:51:49,407 --> 01:51:53,639
<i>♪ That's the terror of knowing
What this world is about ♪</i>

2339
01:51:53,641 --> 01:51:56,372
<i>♪ Watching some good friends
Screaming ♪</i>

2340
01:51:56,374 --> 01:51:57,805
<i>♪ "Let me out!" ♪</i>

2341
01:51:57,807 --> 01:52:01,507
<i>♪ Pray tomorrow takes us higher ♪</i>

2342
01:52:02,040 --> 01:52:05,672
<i>♪ Pressure on people
People on streets ♪</i>

2343
01:52:05,674 --> 01:52:08,574
Mmm.

2344
01:52:11,641 --> 01:52:12,774
<i>♪ Okay ♪</i>

2345
01:52:14,840 --> 01:52:16,971
<i>♪ Chippin' around ♪</i>

2346
01:52:16,973 --> 01:52:18,805
<i>♪ Kick my brains
'Round the floor ♪</i>

2347
01:52:18,807 --> 01:52:22,672
<i>♪ These are the days
It never rains, it just pours ♪</i>

2348
01:52:22,674 --> 01:52:24,474
<i>♪ People on streets ♪</i>

2349
01:52:26,807 --> 01:52:27,973
<i>♪ People on streets ♪</i>

2350
01:52:30,507 --> 01:52:34,805
<i>♪ It's the terror of knowing
What this world is about ♪</i>

2351
01:52:34,807 --> 01:52:37,338
<i>♪ Watching some good friends
Screaming ♪</i>

2352
01:52:37,340 --> 01:52:38,772
<i>♪ "Let me out!" ♪</i>

2353
01:52:38,774 --> 01:52:40,772
<i>♪ Pray tomorrow ♪</i>

2354
01:52:40,774 --> 01:52:42,971
<i>♪ Takes us
Higher, higher, high ♪</i>

2355
01:52:42,973 --> 01:52:46,574
<i>♪ Pressure on people
People on streets ♪</i>

2356
01:52:49,340 --> 01:52:52,674
<i>♪ Turned away from it all
Like a blind man ♪</i>

2357
01:52:53,641 --> 01:52:56,607
<i>♪ Sat on a fence
But it don't work ♪</i>

2358
01:52:57,474 --> 01:53:00,805
<i>♪ Keep coming up with love
But it's so slashed and torn ♪</i>

2359
01:53:00,807 --> 01:53:06,374
<i>♪ Why, why, why ♪</i>

2360
01:53:11,973 --> 01:53:15,838
<i>♪ Love, love, love
Love, love, love, love ♪</i>

2361
01:53:15,840 --> 01:53:19,739
<i>♪ Insanity laughs under pressure
We're cracking ♪</i>

2362
01:53:19,741 --> 01:53:23,605
<i>♪ Can't we give ourselves
One more chance? ♪</i>

2363
01:53:23,607 --> 01:53:27,572
<i>♪ Why can't we give love
That one more chance? ♪</i>

2364
01:53:27,574 --> 01:53:31,505
<i>♪ Why can't we give love
Give love ♪</i>

2365
01:53:31,507 --> 01:53:35,474
<i>♪ Give love, give love,
Give love, give love... ♪</i>

2366
01:53:36,940 --> 01:53:41,772
<i>♪ 'Cause love's
Such an old-fashioned word ♪</i>

2367
01:53:41,774 --> 01:53:46,405
<i>♪ And love dares you
To care for ♪</i>

2368
01:53:46,407 --> 01:53:52,006
<i>♪ The people on
The edge of the night ♪</i>

2369
01:53:52,008 --> 01:53:56,838
<i>♪ And love dares you to change
Our way of ♪</i>

2370
01:53:56,840 --> 01:54:01,405
<i>♪ Caring about ourselves ♪</i>

2371
01:54:01,407 --> 01:54:05,405
<i>♪ This is our last dance ♪</i>

2372
01:54:05,407 --> 01:54:09,472
<i>♪ This is our last dance ♪</i>

2373
01:54:09,474 --> 01:54:10,707
<i>♪ This is ourselves ♪</i>

2374
01:54:13,907 --> 01:54:15,374
<i>♪ Under pressure ♪</i>

2375
01:54:17,674 --> 01:54:19,074
<i>♪ Under pressure ♪</i>

2376
01:54:22,374 --> 01:54:23,373
<i>♪ Pressure ♪</i>